When LB was three weeks old, I decided she would be a “go baby.” I’m not one to be happy at home for very long and the thought of staying in the house with this new person who cried and pooped and ate all the time made me roll my eyes constantly and weep in to piles of tissue. I needed out and she was going to go with me.
Today, as we were driving home from playing at the park with Paige, I decided to go through town so LB could go on a bridge over water and see the big buildings. We drove by Mr. Flinger’s Alumni and I pointed out that is where Daddy went to school. LB was quiet, and I repeated, “See? That is Daddy’s college. Daddy went to school there.”
We drove a bit more and she could see it better so I told her again, “That’s where daddy went to school.” And again after we rounded a corner and could see a different view.
About ten minutes later as we’re passing a mall and the surrounding stores, LB... Read more
I’ve been trying to teach LB not to steal things. There is a fine line between looking at something and being tackled by security guards. The line is called THE DOOR and this concept is lost on my two year old.
LB loves to manhandle things. Toys. Books. Radios. Glasses. Still, at over two now, she has the grip of a Banshy and yells, “MINE MINE!” and strikes out for whatever fancies her attention at the time. More than once, this has been another buddy at the Paul Frank store. Buddy, I can understand, but a woman’s thong? Lotion? A watch? Seems my little kleptomaniac progressed up the money scale and will probably be heading right for the big jewels or important... Read more
I had an OB appointment today with the “new OB.” It wasn’t a recommendation from anyone specifically, but he had a spot open for a new patient. Now I know why.
The “nurse” came out wearing heels, capris with nylons, and a bright pink sweater under the white coat with name tag “CARMAN, RN.” She had huge puffy bleached hair and a thick German accent. She started out ordering other people around while I waited for her to take me back, to what I only could assume would be, a nazi camp. She barked at me to put my coat down and step on the scale. “But not yet!” she yelled. I stepped back. “Leave your shoes on and NOW, GO NOW, oh, you missed it you have to wait for it to say Zero now.” Apparently the scale is... Read more
I won’t list them out for you (trying to keep some level of pride here) but lately? I’m not just off balance, I’m off kilter, off skilter and hilter. I’m a loose hinge. I’m a leaning Christmas Tree. I’m.. well, you get it.
Already my belly is big enough to make my back ache. Already laying on my back or stomach is painful. When I lift my arms... Read more
Lately I’ve been reflecting on our past few Christmases. We’ve moved twice since last year, the year before that LB was just brand new and before that I was blissfully two months away from puking from my first pregnancy.
A little while ago, I read Laura’s post about Sophia crying and remembered LB’s first Christmas. I have vague memories of screaming and not sleeping. I remember leaving her for the first time and coming home to her dressed like a Read more
I have a very l large list for Santa this year. Santa, honey? Listen up.
I’d like my patience back. You know the stuff that keeps you from totally losing your shit on your two year old because you are pregnant, hormonal and tired? And she’s.. well… two? I’d appreciate it and I know LB and Mr. Flinger would, too. So let’s just put this on all our lists. Patience for the mommy.
Also, my sex drive and maybe some lovin’. We have at least six weeks after the baby is born for no nookie and, I’m thinking, three good months of me being so damn huge I either a) don’t want to be touched or b) no logical way to make it work. So right now would be lovely and I know the second trimester is the perfect time for this. So let’s just... Read more
And you thought picking out a garbage can was hard...
Just arrived so this is still fun!
We’re wet but going to have a good time!
The look of optimism
It’s muddy but that’s still ok
Found one we like! This one, Daddy! We like... Read more
When I unveiled the new template, Mr. Flinger asked, “You took down the snowman? What, you can’t handle that much cheer?” It’s not that I’m not a happy person. It’s just that I’m not a happy person RIGHT NOW. I struggle with the desire to be positive and kind and warm and the image of knitting pot holders and saying things like, “gosh darn I burned the brownies. Shoot dang.” In my heart I want to not judge others but I’m so defensive about being judged. I’d like to keep my mouth shut at times but it’s a short lived wish and usually turns in to a mountain of verbal poo spilled in one big glump instead of spread around in pieces so as to not hurt anyone.
I’m doing it now, aren’t I?Read more
I can’t decided which I am more frustrated with today. IE or LB. They both throw tantrums when asked to behave. They both push my buttons until I’m ready to yell. Neither of them plays nicely at times and neither of them gives a rats ass about web design.
Look, let me come right out and say it here. I gosh-darn strongly dislike Internet Explorer. (LB threw out the word crap the other day followed closely by damnit. I am now speaking only in “rated LB” terms around the house and it gets so. bleeping. irritating. But really, do I need my two year old saying fuck? I obviously hit my fuck quota for the year.) Ok, it goes like this….. I get frustrated and unsettled... Read more