Mrs. Flinger: Based on a True Story

Miss Missouri 30/May/2008

Dear whomever works at the State Of Missouri and recently found my website and is my latest and greatest fan,

Please tell me who are you. Because I only know ONE PERSON in Missouri, in all of Missouri, in the ENTIRE STATE of Missouri, and I can’t imagine the odds.

Of course, this is the Internet, so ...

Now, please fess up. I promise to make you my fan club president. It pays well. (Or, wait, no, that’s the President of the United States. I always mix those up. This postition pays crap.) But! It will make me sleep well tonight knowing I’m not totally losing my mind.

Or, tell me you are a publisher and you love mah shit, that is also acceptable.

Or a mom.

Or a lesbian.

Or a fan of Farting.

Either way.... Read more

Mah name, it appears in lights (ish) 29/May/2008

Today’s post is over at MamaPop. Thanks to Sweetney for the chance to purge my pissed off “there’s no way she lost 78 pounds and was a size eight” self. Because I’m damn proud to be a size ten(ish). And ain’t no way I’m losing 78 pounds. Even post pregnancy. Teh. Enz.

(But on a totally related note, snort, LOST finale is on tonight. I’ll be kickin’ back some mojitos with some girlfriends of mine but thanks to DVR, I can have my Mojito and my Read more

My children, they take after their mother 27/May/2008

#Life#The Flinger Family

Hi there! Welcome back to The Work Week. I know, yes, it’s a short week which means you’ll be getting a lot of posts like this: “Ueereeiiiiiiiiii AHGGGhhHHHHH Ppffppttttttt” They’re open to interpretation and should be noted at such.

Today, though, today I will spare you the screeching that is mah brain yelling, “Undefined Object In Gems.” (If you can help me with that, bygod, let me buy you a beer.)

Today I will spare you the 115 photos we took at the In Law’s house for Baby O’s first birthday party.

Today I will spare you the long drawn out discussion about family and fulfillment and blahblah mushass blahblahblah.

Today, I will highlight only this:

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Reactions 25/May/2008

#Life#Getting to know me#Depth and Faith

We have a bedtime routine like most everyone we know. There is some wrestling involved (playfully with LB and out of necessity with the baby). There is tooth brushing, a story or two and a bedtime kiss. Some nights Daddy or I will sit in the small chair next to LB’s bed for five minutes. This helps with the transition for our anxious child and she has come to expect and rely on this time. It’s five minutes. Five out of our entire day.

Some days I feel compelled to run out of their room and start working. Most days I feel the messy kitchen getting grimier and hear the TV blaring. There is chaos and disorder. It bugs me. I like lists. I like things picked up. I like my alone time.

Tonight, as I lay my daughter in bed, I let her know I wasn’t going to... Read more

Little Girls and Their Daddies 24/May/2008



“Yes, Snow White?”

“Dance with me!”



“Yes, Snow White?”

“I love you.”

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It’s your birthday and I’ll cry if I want to 20/May/2008

#Life#The Flinger Family#Baby O

Today was not supposed to be your birthday. I was focused on June 15th but you had a different plan. Instead, today, and every May 20th will be a celebration for us. We’ll celebrate your early arrival, your strength, your loving spirit and your joyful soul.

Today we’ll celebrate you.


You are the baby that took away my words. You are the son that we hoped for. You are the child that laughs easily making everyone smile around you.


You are joy.

You are happiness.

You... Read more

Brutally Honest Monday:  In Which I Ask For Your Help 19/May/2008

#Life#Brutally Honest Mondays

It’s a mixed blessing. I love my job. I love coding. I love being a nerd. I love being a mom (most days) and I love my kids. What a curse to have so many wonderful things in my life. I mean, really, who can complain when the sun is out, the house is clean, the clients are poring in and the work is wonderful?

Lemme try.

My daughter has anxiety. I don’t know what there is to be anxious about at three. My toys! My bed! MY HAIR. It’s everything: the panties that must be pink, the bed that has to be perfect, the barrette that has to be blue with a bow and on the left side. She’s high stress. She worries when I’m upstairs and she’s not. She freaks her shit out when I go lay her brother down in his crib because MommyICan’tSeeYou!! God... Read more

My family. My Country. 13/May/2008

#Life#The Flinger Family

This one is for my Brother-In-Law who was deployed on May 3rd. This is the only website he can get to for a piece of home. Apparently group websites like flickr, myspace, facebook and twitter are off limits but blogs about farting and being driven crazy by two small children are a-ok. Who knew?

A lot of people talk about supporting our troops but wish we’d spend less on our military. A lot of people say they love our country but vow to vote in someone who will take the last bits of what makes us unique away. A lot of people want to thank the people who fight to keep us the United States Of America but don’t know how.

Here’s your chance.

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Six, That’s right, Six posts in one! 08/May/2008


This is a Russian roulette of blog posts. Take your pick!

1. Baby O takes his first step!

2. Baby O is diagnosed with his sixth double ear infection in four months.

3. Snacks on a plane: The perils of traveling with Cheeze-its.

4. The “ultrasounds cause autism” myth debunked: Via demonstration:

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Laughing until I fart 06/May/2008

#Life#Social Clutz Loveable Spaz

I just got my first, er, fifty-first piece of hatemail.

The IP of writes,

“Dear Mrs. Fliger. I’ve known you wanted to be just like Dooce for years but you couldn’t hide it any better? Your web designs suck and your coding is awful and now your stealing ideas from Dooce’s website. Pathetic. Get your own fonts.”

Hang on… Hang on…


Sorry, I’m laughing… so.. incredibly.. hard.. right… now..

I fart when I laugh. Didn’t you know that? My closest friends know that. I figured I’ve told The Internet that at some point or other.

Or maybe I should show you video evidence?

Read more