Mrs. Flinger: Based on a True Story

And then the angel of the lord cometh down and said, “go drink a beer” 05/Apr/2009

#Family Life

We live in a pretty tight community. And by tight I mean the buildings are so close you can fart and hear neighbors laugh three doors down. Or maybe that’s just me and my own farts, I don’t know, but I swear I know when the people next door have sex and when their dog has the runs and when the cop behind us gets lucky one warm night when the windows are open.

Not tight as in, “I know my neighbors and they are the awesome.”

Not tight as in, “I fucking LOVE OUR HOUSE.”

More like “These jeans push my undies up too far remind me why I don’t just wear thongs again?” tight.

(How’s that visual? You’re welcome.)

So when we were walking along in the feet of snow last year and met a nice gal... Read more

He likes big books 03/Apr/2009

#Family Life

He likes Big Books
and you can’t deny

When the other mothers
Ask you why

Your toddler reads with so much grace
and a big ol’ book in his face

You get Horney

Thinkin’ bout being lonely

How fast your kids are grow-grow-growin’

Oh Baby! Baby! You wanna make a brand new Baby!

Those other mothers tried to warn you
You’d start feelin’ that way when the boy turned two

So, fellas! (Yeah!) Fellas! (Yeah!)
Has your wife got the baby itch? (Hell yeah!)
Tell ‘em to squish it! (Squish it!) Squish it! (Squish it!)
Squish them nasty thoughts!

Your baby reads books.
Baby reads books.

Read more

I, too, am just a girl with a blog 01/Apr/2009


If you follow me on twitter, this may be a slight recap. But oh! There is VIDEO. So get comfy and get ready to cringe on my behalf.

Last night we saw Dooce (do you really need me to link to her? Hai?). I’ll be honest, I don’t read Heather that much anymore. I don’t read enough of anyone, anymore, really. (I blame Google Reader that bastardized RSS reader that is like the government aid enabling the bored and lazy.) But I wanted to hear her speak because you hear so much trash on the Internet and I wanted to go formulate an opinion on my own.

And so I did.

I get that we’re frustrated because we write and aren’t paid out the ass for it. I get the jealousy and the wistfulness and the building up of a person entirely too much so... Read more