Being honest to the Internet isn’t as noble as you’d think

Jan 19, 2007

#Pregnancy#The Flinger Family

Internet, you’re always here for me to tell you secrets like the time I tied my bra around hotel curtains, our sex life and vaginal sonograms.  We sit, much like a Folgers commercial, in our PJ’s at breakfast laughing about social fopas and hairy eyebrows.  And I love you for it. I love that you come back to talk about my new panties and boob juice. It means the world to me.

So when I have these thoughts? Feelings? Questions? I figured it’s time I come to you, Internet, and confess something.

I want a penis. No, wait, that sounds strange. *I* don’t want a penis. I want this kid to have a penis. I’m ready for a boy. I think. Most days of the week I think how fun it would be for this kid to be a boy and how having one of each would be such a lovely balance to our little family.

Roughly ten minutes after I have images of LB and CB playing soccer in the huge backyard we miraculously own, LB comes screaming in to the room (having not napped) wanting to play dolls. No! Books! NO! Let’s THROW our books AT the dolls! Better yet? Throw the dolls and the books from the second floor and see if you can hit mommy on the head. WHEEEE.

You see the trouble? I have my boy. I have an active child. I always hear how much more… everything.. boys are. More aggressive. More energetic (oh mah gah). More .. well, just more. And then there’s the issue of where to actually stash the little booger. Penises and butterfly wall decorations just don’t seem to go well together and in our tiny two bedroom townhouse, lil’ man would share with big sister until he was roughly, what, 18? (Thanks for that, by the way, Seattle housing market.) 

LB is an active girl but she’s still a girl. She wants her hands clean and she wants to put her dollies to bed. On the other hand, she cuddles (and pushes and climbs) like any boy in the market and can be just as aggressive on the playground if need be. She’ll stand her own ground, hands on her hips yelling, “NO!” if provoked and part of me loves her for that. I love her independent little self and I applaud her future woman for being more noble and strong willed than her mother.

In the end, I want what everyone wants if you ask me in person. I want a healthy baby. I want this pregnancy to go well, the birth to go without a hitch and the kid to be welcomed in to our family like the missing wheel we always needed.

But if I’m being honest with you here? If I can honestly tell you what I want, want? I want one momma’s boy that will be slightly boring, enjoy his sister’s toys, and sleep through the night at 3 weeks old. Because that is the kind of easy baby the Universe owes me. Placid. Calm. And one who naps until he’s twenty.


  1. Everyone always says boys are more…they are so wrong. My little man is the sweetest, most laid back dude you could dream of. My little lady is a devil. PRAY FOR A BOY!

    By Karly on 2007 01 19

  2. Funny, when we are carrying these little people, we always sort of picture what woud be perfect, what they will be, what they will look like, what their personalities will be like….then, they come out and they are invariably the opposite, in every way, we take one look and for heavens sake just know that actually, THIS is exactly what we wanted really! I got 5 boys and 1 girl, perfect balance in my eyes! My 5 boys are all much more gentle and compromising than my one girl.

    By Helen on 2007 01 19

  3. I’m with Karly—my boy is a gem. Quiet, cerebral, loving, gentle, and sweet. The girl? A SHE-devil. a boy is definitely what you need wink

    By moxiemomma on 2007 01 19

  4. Heh.  I must be the minority.  My boys are very much like puppies.  They chew on everything.  Eat like horses (hell, even the 8mo can pack away more than you think is humanly possible).  Fling poop where you don’t want it.  Oh, and they aren’t as interested in talking as their girl friends are - my 3yo would rather put together a giant train track or turn on the shop-vac or play with the mixer or throw snow at trees.  And did I mention they eat a lot?  And we haven’t even hit 4yo with either of ‘em.  I’m *so* afraid of our grocery budget in about ten years.

    By Lanna on 2007 01 19

  5. My boy was a dream baby…until he became mobile.  That’s when he became the “active” boy you always hear about.  He is still quite sensitive, and has an imagination you wouldn’t believe, which I guess is worth the “activeness” we experience out in public.

    Now my girl?  Is a PERFECT angel (well, unless you can’t fix her food fast enough - hehe).  At 11 months, the most common comment we get about her is “is she *always* this good?”  Just Tuesday her daycare director told me that if they had a room full of Claires they wouldn’t have anything to do.  Makes a mama proud!  BUT she’s not walking yet, so we’ll see if she is struck with the same hyper bug as her big brother smile

    I can’t WAIT to hear what CB is!  We find out on the 31st.  It’s a week and a half of curious torture!

    By Charla on 2007 01 19

  6. And I’m with everyone else. My boy is a laid back, sweet, precious Momma’s boy. (Of course he isn’t quite a year old yet, so who knows what he’ll be in a few years.) But my daughter is crazy, hyper, independent, strong-willed, loud, shall I go on? I’m hoping you guys have a boy as well.
    Oh, and we own a two bedroom house and my two share a room as well. Oh well, maybe one day we’ll move one of them down to the creepy, dark basement.

    By Ali on 2007 01 19

  7. LB sounds exactly like Abby, except Abby naps.  I am so grateful for that one trait.  She’s definitely not a girly-girl, although she’s just now starting to like girly things.  Like getting her nails painted.  Her favorite activity is wrestling with us, but she gets so rough we end up screaming Uncle first.  She’s so active and chatty.  Oh. My. God.  The talking. Make her stop!

    Everyone keeps telling me that the second baby is nothing like the first.  I hope to God they’re right.  I can’t handle another colicky baby with a banshee toddler on the loose!

    By Brandi on 2007 01 19

  8. Boys rock. I love my boy, he’s my little buddy, my handsome boy, hearing mommy in that little boy vioce? Best thing ever, man.

    By Sarah on 2007 01 19

  9. I am officially going on record as wanting a boy. Of course, I’ll still be HAPPY if it’s a girl (hey! I know those parts! I can potty train that!) but I’ll be holding my breath a little bit.

    Just a LITTLE bit (as I stare down puberty with two girls both wanting the phone and boyfriends at the same time…. shudder.)

    By Mrs. Flinger on 2007 01 19

  10. I have a 5 year old “little” boy and a 3 year old little girl and let me tell you…........if I would not have gotten pregnant with my second before my son started to really get mobile and independent, he would probably be an only child. To this day, he is my biggest challenge. He pushes the limits to the max and argues like there is no tomorrow. Then there is Ana…......you tell her something and that’s that. No arguements and not much pushing limits. Don’t get me wrong, she definitely has her moments were she is not “perfect” but she is still the easier child of the two. I hav, however, met many little boys that are the complete opposite of my Alex. I keep my sanity by thinking that these strong personality traits will get Alex far in life. He will definitely not be one to mess with. So truely the debate is never ending.

    By Babsi on 2007 01 20

  11. Yeah. I hear ya. I have the first child of which you speak. I don’t give two hoots what this next one is, as long as it has less energy than its brother. I would be rooting for a girl, but like you pointed out, they can be just as energetic, so there is no gurarantee there. wink

    I can see you guys with a boy…

    So my vote? Is that there’s one in there… wink

    By Erin on 2007 01 20

  12. my first born in a boy…and i was the same as you, really hoping for a girl. to have the one of each!
    but alas, its was a boy and i love him dearly!  in the end i was happy for a healthy and thankfully a happy baby!!
    so maybe there is still hope for a girl with #3!!

    By janelle on 2007 01 20

  13. I was convinced I was having a penis the second time around but now I have two vaginas!

    Wait a minute, that doesn’t sound right.

    Any way, the cool thing about having two girls is they play with the same toys, share clothes, etc. Now as they get older I’m sure the “sharing” thing will go down the toilet, but for the most part they do. So from a very practical anal retentive standpoint, it’s nice to have two kids of the same gender. Plus, they play together and wear each other out! Maybe if you have a girl she will be just as active as LB and LB will have met her active match!

    Can’t wait to find out what you are having either way. smile

    By Jamie on 2007 01 20

  14. Argg- was about to hit “submit” when my battery died on the lappytoppy.  So, to recap…

    Heh- I wish you a healthy, happy baby who sleeps through the night at three weeks.  Hahaha… Of course, you’ll probably get that and be laughing right back at me. wink
    With our first I was so surprised when I found out we were having a boy, and I was freaked thinking I wouldn’t know what to do with a boy! but he’s absolutely been the “perfect” or “just right” child for our family.  We feel so lucky- for reals! 

    Oh, btw- we know what both of ours are- we’re just not telling! [Evil Laugh!]

    By Jessica on 2007 01 20

  15. I can’t wait to hear what you’re having either. I still think it’s a boy, though. You should start a pool on this (quick! before Monday! Ha!).

    By Colleen on 2007 01 20

  16. You’ll tell us. You HAVE TO, LESLIE!!! No pressure or anything… wink

    Is CB more active than LB in utero? My sister noticed a huge difference in the activity of her babies—her son was waaaay more active than her daughter.

    I’ve probably told you that I freaked out when we were pretty sure we saw male parts at our ultrasound (though we didn’t want to know). I didn’t know what the heck I’d do with a boy. And of course he’s a total sweetheart, and I love him to the moon and back.

    Here’s to a happy, healthy baby… a miracle from God, no matter what kind it is!!

    CAN’T WAIT!!!

    By Marie on 2007 01 20

  17. I can’t wait until Monday!!!  Either way, you’ll be all set.

    If it’s a girl, you already have all of the stuff.  That’ will make prep much easier!

    If it’s a boy, boy’s are easier.  They just are.  But, they break more stuff, and they smell worse when they get older.

    It’s a toss up. wink

    By Friglet on 2007 01 20

  18. I think I can answer this one.  My first two were boys.  And all boys I might add.  You just expected them to come into a room, with all of their energy, and slide across the room.  In fact, boys do a lot of that sliding thing.  Then along came baby girl.  Dressed her up in frilly things for a while.  Actually, about 5 or 6 yo and then she started being tough and wanted to keep with with her brothers.  And she absolutely did.  She was as much, if not more active than her brothers.  The first one and the last one were not sleepers and had spastic tummies.  We got through it somehow, but it was a pain.  The middle one, the perfect baby, if there is such a thing.  Slept through the night from the first night home.  Honestly, I loved the differences of the sexes and enjoyed them all so much.  Just like you will.  But, I hope you get a boy too!

    By Brenda on 2007 01 20

  19. Oooh!  Exciting!  I can’t wait to hear what it is.  You want your boy as much as I want a girl- however, I’m scared of Barbies.

    By sarahgrace on 2007 01 20

  20. I forsee a boy in your future.

    Or it may just be a girl who found your vibrator under your bed.

    It’s fuzzy.

    By Jenny on 2007 01 20