Change

23/Feb/2010

Life is a constant ebb and flow. It is change. I’ve been revisiting my favorite Buddha Book, re-reading the passages I underlined 10 years ago. Change is a big topic in Buddhism. Change is a big topic in my life right now.

image

Even if it’s great, change is still…. Change.

Change is leaving a house you brought your baby home in. Change is giving the children a backyard to grow in. Change is watching your baby grow in to a caring little man. Change is watching your daughter learn to read.

I’ve never dealt well with change and yet I seek it almost in earnest. I seek to better our lives daily. I push to find new challenges. I work to bring a healthier lifestyle and a better approach to obstacles. But sometimes, even so, I wish for things to stay as they were. Not physically, perhaps, except in the way my body used to look at 18. No, more on an existential plane. In the way my children snuggled my chest as they slept as babies. In the way my husband looked in my eyes on our wedding day. In the way we celebrated our accomplishments the day we got news we were moving back to Seattle.

image

Change can be powerful, wonderful and completely overwhelming. One day, I know, I’ll look back at these two weeks and know it went well.

In the mean time, I’ll just push on keeping my head above water however hard I have to tred. Change is coming like a tide. I’m gearing up for the ride.

Hi

13 guests here now.

Comments

  1. I’m not so good with change especially when, I’m not in control of it.

    By gorillabuns on 2010 02 23

  2. These two weeks will be over before you know it.

    I know you’re flowing with the change right now, but I always find it interesting when people put so much energy into resisting change, even if it’s for the better.

    I can’t wait to see your new home.

    By Tricia Honea on 2010 02 23

  3. I can’t wait to have you over to our new house, Tricia. And Gorillabuns, me too. At least I fee. invested in this huge change. It’s for the good. smile

    By Mrs. Flinger on 2010 02 23

  4. Guess we’re officially grown-up now, huh? raspberry

    These two weeks will pass… and everything has this way of working out.  Really.  Believe.  I do.

    xoxo

    ~Christine

    By Christine McGee on 2010 02 23

  5. Sounds like you’ve got quite a bit going on, and I know how overwhelming that is. Good luck getting through the transition. Things definitely seem to be moving in a good direction for you though!

    By Mary@Everyday Baby Steps on 2010 02 23

  6. The kind of change you are experiencing is enough to drive anyone bonkers. But I have every confidence you can handle it because you are that kind of awesome. And strength. Well you haz that too.

    Can’t wait to see the new digs!

    By Stacey on 2010 02 23

  7. Change is a bitch, which is why it makes us bitchy. Bwahahahaha. No, seriously, you are going through life fitness, tearing what you know to help it grow back stronger. It’s a beautiful thing! Good for you for having the cojones to do it.

    By amanda on 2010 02 23

  8. I read once that moving is the 2nd most stressful thing a married couple can endure. Number 1 is a death in the family. Crazy.

    Change is scary, but this is a good one. Trust me, we just got our “dream house” a few months ago. It’s awesome. You’ll love it.

    By cindy w on 2010 02 23

  9. It’s such good change. I’m really happy for you!

    By heather... on 2010 02 23

  10. Thanks for linking to the book…change scares me and that fear holds me back…this year there is no holding back allowed so i need to deal with the fear.

    By rachel on 2010 02 23

  11. Not to be ominous, but as time goes on, this change will look like a walk in the park. And dealing with those, more scary, changes will be all the easier because of what you learn from this.

    Happy packing.

    By Nancy on 2010 02 23

  12. Right now, I’m at the opposite point with change.  It is my BFF and I’m comforting myself with the idea that certain challenges are only temporary.

    By TexasRed on 2010 02 23

  13. I find I cannot quote Buddhist texts without sounding a little pretentious.  Therefore, I will quote Firefly.  It is my meditation through migraines, stressful situations, and when I find I’m getting in my own way:

    “This is just a moment in time.  Step aside and let it happen.”

    Plus, you have the awesome constant of being decidedly you.  And I kinda (really) like you.  grin

    By CitricSugar on 2010 02 23

  14. Such big changes happening for you right now. I *know* you’ll be glad when the change is the ordinary again.

    By patois on 2010 02 23

  15. ahhh. *breathe in* *breathe out*
    Be Well. Good packing.
    Happy lawn.

    By Al_Pal on 2010 03 05