Internet Explorer and my two year old: a toss up

09/Dec/2006

I can’t decided which I am more frustrated with today. IE or LB. They both throw tantrums when asked to behave. They both push my buttons until I’m ready to yell. Neither of them plays nicely at times and neither of them gives a rats ass about web design.

Look, let me come right out and say it here. I gosh-darn strongly dislike Internet Explorer. (LB threw out the word crap the other day followed closely by damnit. I am now speaking only in “rated LB” terms around the house and it gets so. bleeping. irritating. But really, do I need my two year old saying fuck? I obviously hit my fuck quota for the year.) Ok, it goes like this….. I get frustrated and unsettled at life in general. Perhaps it’s a mom who is prettier and not gagging hours a day over her sink that makes me wish I wasn’t me. Or maybe it’s the car’s “check engine” light that appears on a random basis having nothing what-so-ever to do with getting gas or a gas cap like one would hope. Or maybe it’s the two year old being very two-sie and me being very preg-sie and we just collide a little too long. It is times like this that I really want to escape to my happy place. You’d never guess where that is? (No, it’s not partying in the bathroom while the 6 month old sleep in the hotel room, but that was a fun memory…) My happy place is my blog. It’s the escape I get when things just are too .... real.. in real life.

Y’all are my happy place. (Sounds of people going “ahhhh” followed closely by gagging.)

It’s no surprise that I come here looking for a warm feeling in my heart but when I see the ick template, I decide it’s time to change it. Then I obsess for a couple of days about css rules and why you have to use javascript to get your sidebars to align correctly and I nerd out in my happy zone. When I step back, it’s pretty (enough) and I like it (for now).

Until I load the page in Internet Explorer and there is blood and shrieking and violence in my happy place.

So. Here I am. With one lovely template in Firefox and a

fuckedup version in IE. And do you know what? I DO NOT CARE. That’s right, Internet, I am officially the worst designer in the world because I just unveiled my work half finished

. Of course, you know I’m currently sitting behind the curtain staring at code going, “WHAT THE FUCK!” (Ooops, I mean, what in the gosh darn world…)

For now, though, do everyone in the world a favor. Download Firefox. Then come back here and enjoy a functioning footer with sidebars that actually go the length of the page. ‘Cause DAMN if I’m cowering to Bill Gates (again.) And while you’re at it, by a Mac.

Current Bugs to Fix***

sidebar length in IE Footer in IE Title images in Safari

(Please fill out what looks broken to you. It should look like the screen shot here.)

Also, while you’re waiting for me to get my act together, feel free to keep the “what we do for the holidays” discussion going. I’m enjoying a rousing rendition of “holy crap, people travel EVERYWHERE” right now. I had no clue so many of you get around on Christmas Day. You Christmas whores, you.

(**updated** someone check the temperature in hell. I think the template is fixed in IE and the toddler is asleep. It’s surely cold down there, surely cold…)

Hi

11 guests here now.

Comments

  1. Seems to be working great in IE right now. I know, I know. I SHOULD be on Firefox. My husband’s head swivels 360 degrees every time I launch IE (he’s a programmer and Firefox purist) on my PC (I luv Safari on Mac).

    The new design is smashing! Gorgeous! And well worth all the “fucks” you had to stifle get it done.

    By Colleen on 2006 12 09

  2. Fuckin’ great template! I have been using Firefox a lot more recently, and it’s currently my browser of choice. I’m thinking of checking out Opera, I’ve never tried it and there are a couple of minor things that irk me about Firefox.

    That’s quite touching that we’re your happy place.

    By JC on 2006 12 09

  3. Awsome post!  Yeah, I’ve been begging people who visit my blog to axe IE and just get FireFox.  It’s just easier, cooler, more manageable…  And I don’t feel like a looser for not catering to the looser-masses who actually <i>like</e> IE.  I feel like a winner for taking the lead and kicking their little booties into high-gear by forcing them to get FireFox or else not be able to really see my site correctly.

    Sorry the 2’s and the preg’s are hitting you and LB at the same time.

    By Caroline on 2006 12 09

  4. I got here after it was fixed.  I love it.  My favorite so far.  Nice work.

    By Sitting Still on 2006 12 09

  5. It looks great to me! I love the slogan!

    By Sara on 2006 12 09

  6. Looking good my dear!  Fucking great if you ask me!  Except I thought you really liked the chocolate/latte martinis?  Although I am sure for you any damn martini would be good right now. wink

    By traci on 2006 12 09

  7. I like your writing and I don’t care what template you are using as long as the text is visible. I use IE (actually GreenBrowser, a shell for IE’s rendering engine) and your site looks good. I don’t think that anyone that reads your blog is interested very much in its design. Do not alienate those that are using IE, I myself like GreenBrowser over Firefox because it is more usable for what I need. Actually the real display problems are in Opera, but again the text is OK, and that’s what is important.

    By jders on 2006 12 09

  8. I love the new “VIRGIN” template. It’s working on this end. But I’m actually on a mac and firefox. So my husband gave me his powerbook because he got the new one. Must be nice huh? His company pays for it. I guess he needs it being in design and all but anyhoo. The other day I opened it up and the monitor cracked right off the damn keyboard! So I’m typing with it propped up. It’s only a few years old! THE NERVE! I’ve never seen such a thing happen. Have you?

    By kelli on 2006 12 10

  9. Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm… purty.

    I know absolutely ZERO about Firefoxes or Internet Exploders or jaba-the-hut script or anything else, so I just get to sit back and enjoy the end result.  Mmmmmmmmmmmmm…. purty.

    I do, however, know that the absolute BEST word EVER in the ENTIRE history of human language is————-  FUCK.  So, I am loathe to eliminate it from my daily repertoire.  I know that I MUST do so before B figures out its awesome POWER, but that is probably a few years off, right?  I mean, come on… FUCK just fucking rocks the fucking house when it comes to expressionisms (yeah, I said expressionisms as if it was a real word). 

    Oh, and a comment for back on the entry about “parenting by choices”... Mr. Flinger is right - total totalitarianism.  Live with it or move out and get a job.  smile

    By Katie Kat on 2006 12 10

  10. Lurve Firfox. Thanks for stopping by the other day! And I just live a touch south of you….right down I-5….it’s nice having people to share this kind of stuff with, both the good and the sad.

    Template looks good. I’m not a designer at all, therefore the bland Blogger green.

    By Jenny on 2006 12 10

  11. Wow. You are preaching to the choir on this one. I took a web design class last year and I always prefer Firefox. I did a huge final project and had to display it to the class. Trust me, it looked beautiful at home on Firefox but the class computer to present on had IE only. It was wacked out to say the least. Colors’s didn’t match, the background was screwey, and for some reason one of my tables (yeah I know they are arcane) went HUGE.

    I keep saying to myself some day I am going to spring for a Flinger blog design because working with blogger templates is annoying to say the least. I wish there was something like Dreamweaver for blogger.

    By IrishWalsh on 2006 12 10

  12. It looks great to me!  Of course I’m super smart and cool, so I use Firefox. wink

    I love, love, love your tagline!  You’re so damn witty. smile

    By Friglet on 2006 12 10

  13. Because I can’t say it enough hisssss to Firefox. raspberry

    By Sarah on 2006 12 10

  14. Well, I forgave IE when it decided to play nicely with me and we made up a little bit. At least in the “now the majority of people who visit can see the actual site.”

    I think it’s something like 89&#xIE; users and the rest globbed in Safari, Firefox and Opera.

    Poor Poor Opera users. I know I suck at coding for Opera. tongue laugh Sorry ahead of time.

    By Mrs. Flinger on 2006 12 10

  15. I’ve been hooked on Firefox for a long time! Screw IE!

    By Marie on 2006 12 11

  16. I personally love the new look.  I do find it funny, however, that you waited until you were knocked up to make your layout alcohol-related.  Wishful thinking, I guess.  The last layout was just a little too wholesome.  This one’s just right!

    By Emily on 2006 12 11

  17. Must I be the party pooper? The 3 martini glasses at the bottom are covering up a big chunk of text in the last post of the page. I’m running Safari on a Mac, BTW.

    I took a screen shot; email me at the gmail address if you want me to send it to you.

    But seriously? Otherwise, it’s my fave layout/theme so far.

    By dajamama on 2006 12 12

  18. Yeah, I like it the best so far as well.

    By IrishWalsh on 2006 12 12