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May, 16, 2006

On moms

Reflecting back on my childhood, I realize there are several things I’d do again. In fact, there are several things my Mom did that I plan, and hope, to use in LB’s (and subsequent children’s) lives. Reflecting back, I realize being my mom just might not be the juicy baggage a therapist might enjoy plucking out of me. But, to quote Mr. Flinger, I’m a “New Age Mom.” I believe it means I come with a pile of sarcasm, a dash if wit and some love tossed into the salad bowl to make a career laden woman with too many emotions and mommy-guilt the size of Texas to kick my own ass with.

Ahhh, good times. Good times.

So, back to my thought, my childhood. My mom is a woman who has/had/did it all. She was home for us when we needed her. She got a Bachelor’s, a Masters (both just within months of me) and a career while taking us to the zoo, gymnastics, the beach, to see Santa. We went on field trips, she took us TeePeeing (she did. honest to god, the did) and to the mall. She let me talk on the phone for hours and hours while shoving my little sister and her barbie playing friends out of my room. The woman deserves a farkin’ medal. (Please note: Fark is the new fuck but with snark. It’s safe for the whole family AND it’s fun to say. Fark! Fark! So, use it and abuse it, just remember you heard it here first, folks. Mrs.Flinger: Making a New Vocabulary one post at at time. Alright.. again.. back to my thought…)

I’ve decided to implement some of the things my mom did when I was growing up. Like, for example, we always got to skip a half day of school in the spring time to go to the beach. Yessir. We’d drive down to Galveton (that’s Texas for you Yankee types) and play in the sand before the crowds hit. In addition, we got to take a friend. For real. We’d also miss half a day to visit Santa when we were younger. We got candy on Saturday mornings (only) and we got to make tents with sheets in the living room. She’d listen to “our” radio station in Jr. High and she’d take me school clothes shopping in August.

I’m gonna do these things, too, because I think I turned out pretty damn great.

So what is it that you would do the same, if you can, that your mom did for you? Is it the way she let your friends come to family functions so you wouldn’t drive yourself (or her) nutso with the “can we go home now?” Is it the way she let your high school boyfriend go to the beach with you when you got out of school early (by the way: that same boyfriend is now your husband and is part of the “are we going to raise our kids this way, too” conversation.) Is it how she baked four gazillion Christmas cookies and let the neighborhood come by for a treat? Is it how she’d stand on the front lawn talking to your neighbors whlie you rode your hot-wheels with your friends? What is it? Because I’m sure you’d find something to implement in your own child’s life. Even if you have to look a little closely, I know it’s there.

May, 16, 2006 Filed in: Depth and Faith •The Flinger Family • Read the Archives comment

Comments

  • ^starshine
    J05/16/2006

    My Mom is awesome in the fact that she let me have free reign with paint.  I would paint my clothes, my room, anything…and she was cool with that.  I grew up with glue gun burns and acrylic paint under my nails and I LOVED it! And I am proud to say that my girls and I have already started their artist journey.

  • Susie
    J05/16/2006

    I got to decorate my room however I wanted. I also got to go to concerts and things with my older siblings. She trusted them completely with me and so they would take me all over the place. Including Disney…2x.

    I just wrote a post in a similar vein yesterday.

  • Renee
    J05/16/2006

    I love this post! My mom was always the coolest mom too. She used to take my sister and I to the mall, and let us skip school to do so! How can you beat that?
    (I can also see myself letting my girls do this!)

  • Amy
    J05/16/2006

    Waffles for dinner! I had permission to skip school once in high school just to go skiing (my rationale: cheaper on Mondays and I have good grades!)  My mom spent $$$ on Esprit clothes and acid wash jeans for me in 6th grade since I had to have them. My mom and I exchanged notes in jr. high when stuff was too mixed up for me to talk about. My parents told all three kids that we could always call from a party and they’d come get us-no questions asked and that if we were ever curious about smoking, they’d buy us a pack to let us try it rather than being pressured by friends (all 3 of us still have never touched one!).

    There are many things that I’d like to continue with my daughter. Great post!

  • Jamie
    J05/16/2006

    My mom wasn’t the typical “fun” mom either. But she raised me as a single mom after she and my dad split when I was 7. My brother is 7 years older than me and my sisters are 11 and 12 years older so in essence people always thought of me as an only child since my siblings were so much older. One thing she always instilled in me constantly was that I could do anything that I wanted in life. Career wise. College degree wise. She never allowed me to say “I can’t!” She’s always been my biggest fan and cheerleader and I hope to always encourage my girls like she did.

  • laura
    J05/17/2006

    My mom stayed home with us and homeschoole us. i have really fond memories of early childhood with her. I wish she’d been a little bit more “friend-like” with me, about boys and things like that; I’ll probably do that differently. But after I got out of high school, we started traveling together and that was a total blast. Greece, Mexico, England and Scotland…she’s great to travel with and taught me a lot about being self-sufficient on those trips. That’s something I really want to do with my kids, too.

  • Candice
    J05/18/2006

    Your Oma is SO not my oma.
    But mine did take us camping. ALOT. We camped every summer. I have wonderful memories of places I don’t even know where the are. Mostly the central coast and northern california. Some of Oregon. It is something I want to do with my children. And introduce to my husband, who, poor thing, never went fishing in his life until last summer. And he GREW UP on the central coast. But has never been camping. Oh except for his little stint in the army where they went and camped in the desert. I don’t think that counts.

  • sara
    J05/19/2006

    My brother and I were big into theatre in high school and mom was there every rehearsal being the best “Drama Mama” there was.  She made costumes and helped paint sets and offered up stuff from home for props all the time.  One girl asked me one time if it bugged me that she was always around and I was surprised, my mom and I always got along so well it didnt occur to me that it should bother me.
    when we were younger my parents would let us skip a day every year and take us to Six Flags. 
    Both of my parents made it clear that we could do whatever we wanted in life and let me move to NYC when I was 17 to pursue modeling and when I grew to hate it and the people I was dealing with I called and said I wanted to come home, finish high school, go to prom, and go to college like normal kid, they came and got me no questions asked.
    my parents also did the whole “we will come get you from a party no questions asked” thing, but I was never in that situation- so I never had to test that one out.

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