Sexy Code: Bringin’ It

02/May/2009

Because women have a sense of humor, too, as well as brains and wit and the ability to multi-task.

To the men who 1) Have treated me like a moron because I have tits but can better explain a database query than anyone in their “committee” of men 2) Doubted said ability 3) Said I couldn’t learn to code 4) Ignored my experience and looked directly at my mail co-worker WHO I WAS TRAINING to ask a technical question (and didn’t know the answer) and 5) Need to see something about sex to get their attention.

<?php
$sexy=date(“notOvulating”);
if ($sexy==“Fri”)
  echo “Bring it On Baby!!”;
else
  echo “We’re closed!”;
?>

<?php
function getItOn($horny, $kids)
  {
echo "You" . $horny . " and the kids are" . $kids "
;
}


while($sexy == notOvulating) {
echo getItOn("are not horny", "awake");
echo getItOn("are totes horny", "awake");
echo getItOn("have blue balls", "asleep");
echo getItOn("wanna do it", asleep");
}

?>

Results:

“You are not horny and the kids are awake”
“You are totes horny and the kids are awake”
“You are not horny and the kids are awake”
“You have blue balls and the kids are asleep”
“You wanna do it and the kids are asleep”

My book: I write sexy code- One woman’s Tale of Feminism in Technology will be out later this year. Until then: #suckit.

Hi

12 guests here now.

Comments

  1. YES!!!!!!

    By Karen Sugarpants on 2009 05 02

  2. #SNORT

    By Sarcastic Mom on 2009 05 02

  3. Amen sista! Fuckin’ A.

    By sam {temptingmama} on 2009 05 02

  4. I don’t know half of what that means. smile

    By Dawn on 2009 05 02

  5. You can write code for me any time.

    By Virginia on 2009 05 02

  6. This just made my day, dude.

    By Maria on 2009 05 02

  7. I believe the operative words are Bite Me! LOL!! You totally made my day!

    By mrschattypants on 2009 05 03

  8. This is the best piece of code I’ve looked at all day!

    By T with Honey on 2009 05 04

  9. Hawt.  Sexy code!

    By Al_Pal on 2009 05 07

  10. I think I know some of the men you’re talking about, and I think I’m going to share this with them. Not that they’ll get it. But nicely done!

    By Scott on 2009 05 13