Geeky Talks
Still A Little Girl At Heart
When I was five, or six, or maybe as late as eight (but I won’t admit to that), I used to lay on my stomach in my room and look through the bEST Catalog. Remember that store? The store with the roof that looked like it weathered four hurricanes, and probably did, and had THE VERY BEST TOY SECTION EVERRRRR. I mean EVERRRR.
Maybe it was a Houston thing, but I loved that store.
Think of the Sears’ Toy Catalog at Christmas: It was like that but year round.
So I would lay and look at the doll house section because there was nothing more that I wanted than the life-size doll house with the wooden dolls and real wood furniture and carpet and lights. I’d stare at it picturing myself playing with the dolls. In my head, I’d have them walk upstairs and switch on a light. :: BLING :: It would turn on and the wood mommy would start gathering her triplets together because she was just that awesome about everything. And her wallpaper was beautiful. And her husband was a rock star. And they were rich and had fancy cars and lots of friends and parties.
I have this dream still, but I don’t stare at the doll houses anymore. I look out the windows as I drive by their houses and picture those wooden moms gathering up their children in their perfect lives.
One of my favorite evening activities is walking at dusk along a quiet neighborhood street. I love looking in to people’s windows as the sky grows dark and see how they decorated their homes or know that all over America, we’re all the same, cooking dinner, doing the dishes, yelling at our children. We’re watching TV on our too-big screens and we’re gathering the family in the living rooms of our homes where the kids lay on their stomachs watching or playing with something. It’s comforting in a way, how alike we are.
This is why it’s so hard for me to understand the differences. Why one political view or one religious view could possibly take all those similarities and toss them out the (proverbial) window. I don’t get it. Aside from some ideals, we’re all pretty much the same, seeking the best for our families and friends and health. And I get that we all have different ways of getting there, I get that. But in the end, we have to answer to ourselves alone. You make your heaven on earth. I think I heard that somewhere. From someone. Kinda famous.
It’s the alikeness of people that almost got me on a plane to Oakland tomorrow to see my good friend Vdog. It’s because we’re so alike, in our ideals and relationships and selves, that I would hop a flight with 24 hours notice to see her. It’s the fact that we’re all people and we all need our people and we have people in our lives for reasons we might not know until the day we need to know.
It was the fifteen minutes while we talked about planning a quick trip: “What time to I leave?” “When do I get back?” “Oh, we can do this! and we can go here! And AND AND…” I was reminded of staring in to the doll house in the catalog, giving us the freedom to visualize the trip, seeing ourselves already in those places, laughing and giggling. It was the fifteen minutes before we realized maybe not this weekend, maybe not tomorrow, but soon, that we both were in the same page on the catalog, dreaming.
In this way I’ll never grow up, never stop wanting, never stop dreaming. But one day I will own my house with the lights and the stairs and enough rooms for all our children to have their own. And maybe even a little left over for a trip to see a friend on short notice just because she needs me.
One day.
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I loved the Best catalog! There wasn’t a Best in my town but there was one in Sacramento and my grandma would take us sometimes and buy us stuff my parents couldn’t afford and man I remember practically rolling around in all the glossy full-color toy-filled goodness. I love that feeling where anything is possible. It’s all there for you if you know how to take it. And in the immortal words of Chris Cornell, sometimes the have is not as good as the want. But other times, it’s better. Thanks for a great post and a fun trip to my childhood.
My new biggest wish ever?
That every girl could have besties.
Ones you can drive to or fly across the country to and nothing would matter but being together.
I’m so happy you have my wish already.
I used to watch the lights turning on and off at night when I was living in the larger cities and wondering about the stories of the people turning those lights on and off.
My story was a little different though. They were perfect, powerful career women living in their well decorated apartments that had “Great Bones”! LOL
I didn’t know anyone else did that!
I loved the Best catalog. I would hide it so I could look through it when I wanted to, and my mom couldn’t throw it away. I miss that store sometimes.
I’ve never seen a Best catalog.
You all look like you should be in high school.
This is why it’s so hard for me to understand the differences. Why one political view or one religious view could possibly take all those similarities and toss them out the (proverbial) window. I don’t get it.
Oh I remember the days when a toy catalog was something to be drooled over- whatever happened to that??
Soon we’ll be old and drooling without the need for catalogs.
It’s good to see you’re keeping your dreams alive and not growing old before your time.. :o)
I?d have them walk upstairs and switch on a light. :: BLING :: It would turn on and the wood mommy would start gathering her triplets together because she was just that awesome about everything. And her wallpaper was beautiful. And her husband was a rock star. And they were rich and had fancy cars and lots of friends and parties.