Geeky Talks
The problem with a “go baby”
When LB was three weeks old, I decided she would be a “go baby.” I’m not one to be happy at home for very long and the thought of staying in the house with this new person who cried and pooped and ate all the time made me roll my eyes constantly and weep in to piles of tissue. I needed out and she was going to go with me.
I started walking with her every day in the Bjorn. I was determined she’d figure out this whole “day time is for wakey and night time is for sleepy” thing. Also, I needed to walk off the sixty pounds I gained during pregnancy and figured hauling her around was a sure way to do it.
We visited the Jelly Bellies, we went to the park, we went to playgroup. We never stayed home for an entire day without going somewhere, even if it was just a ride to Starbucks so she could flirt with the Baristas. I prided myself on this child that could go most places, enjoyed being out and craved people as much as I did. I thought it was fantastic.
We did this most of her first two years. Then one day, we moved 260 miles north and I got pukey. Our house shrunk 400 square feet and I gained 10 pounds. We had no friends, no plans and no place to go. I’ve tried to find places and things to wear down LB. She loves the “Jump Park” and asks to go every day. And therein lies the problem: She asks to go every day.
She asks for Jelly Belly every day. She stands at the top of the stairs and says, “Ready to go! LB ready to GO!” She will go put on her Velcro shoes, attempt her coat until she yells, “TOO HARD!” and stand at the door. She will yell for me to come get my coat and shoes. She will ask for Buddy and tell me it’s time to go see Luke or Jelly Belly or the Jump Park.
I created a go monster.
I have to change our life. The past two months (my god, it’s only been two months) were full of begging for her to nap while I go hug the toilet and crawl in to bed every afternoon. It’s been long long days of rain and gloom with a toddler and an emotional pregnant lady stuck in the same 700 square feet for days. We practically growl at each other and wish for the other to just Go. Away. Already. We need space. We need room. We need people.
I’m hoping to find a solution that gives LB a place to be with little friends and time for Mommy to get her online work done during the day. I realized I’ve been working 12 hours a day keeping LB safe and shaping her character and then working another 4 hours at night shaping the character of students in my class. I then crawl in to bed and wake up to a screaming toddler and do it all over again. It’s time to take back my evenings. It’s time to get LB a place of her own. It’s time to get us both space, two days a week for four hours each day, a grand total of eight hours a week. Space, though, non the less. Perhaps she’ll make a friend or two and I’ll join a Mom group. Is it pathetic and horrible that we’re just that needy? At this point I honestly don’t care now. We need stuff. We need places. It’s time to get out there.
I just wish I could take all of you with me.
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I’ve got a go-baby too, and I totally understand where you are coming from! Claire would not nap today until we had run some errands. If I so much as look at my shoes, she’s heading for the door.
You know where I stand on this. She will be fine at school. Better than fine. She’ll probably be rounding up those other kids like a professional cowgirl. And you’ll be able to teach and design and puke—in peace!
I know exactly how you feel. There are days I look at Evie pulling at my leg and I feel so freakin’ guilty because all I want is a little “me time.” She’ll do fine in school. And you? You get to be pukey all by your sweet lonesome!
school will be good for LB. She strikes me as a girl a lot like Lily and actually, preschool has been awesome for both my girls. Plus it saves me for a few hours a week and a good mommy is better for the girls than a crazy psychotic yelling one. As you may suspect.
We were go go go too until winter hit. Ugh! I hope it’ll get better REALLY soon. Last summer we were out every single day, even if it was only to the park! It’ll get better. And pre-school sounds like fun to me!
I wish you could take me/us with you too! Ah, the fun we’d have.
Is the puking still going on? I hoped once the second trimester hit things would settle down. :(
If only we weren’t an entire continent apart, we’d go find it all together.
Yup. Same issues here. She’ll be GREAT in school a few hours a week, though! And it will give you some MUCH needed off time. Congrats on taking this big step - here’s hoping sanity will soon fall back into line
Yup she needs school and so do you!!! Good luck!
I completely understand - having a newborn AND a busy toddler means a lot more time at home than usual (the pediatrician has me freaked out about RSV, so we’re not venturing out much at all). The busy toddler at least has new toys to play with, but it doesn’t wear her out enough to nap. It’s driving me crazy!
I think LB having her own place to go and giving you a little time is a great idea. She’ll thrive on the social interaction and you’ll have some work time, or *gasp* freetime!
Good idea!
Heh, yeah, I feel your pain. Except in reverse. We’ll get someplace and I’ll go to get the older kiddo out of the car, and he’ll start fussing about going back home. I’m a little too hermit-like it seems. Oops.
That is the PINKEST sock monkey EVER.
Way to go! That is good news for both you and LB. Now much deserved time for both of you.
We so need to get together.
Why don’t you live next to me? Seriously. Would you be willing to relocate?
Happy new year, my friend. I’m so glad to know you.
Hannah is the same way. GO GO GO!!
I can’t wait for school to start.
Oh, Hannah is sitting next to me and saying that LB is so cute.
I have been counting down the days, nay hours, until “school” starts back tomorrow. You definitely both deserve to find a cool mom’s day out type program. There’s a reason they call it that ya know.
Oh the places you’ll both go when you can give each other a little space!
You are NOT needy. You are normal and you’re pregnant and you’ve moved to an entirely new environment. You both need to make new friends. Now go get ‘em girls!
Settling in in a new city when you’re in the first trimester AND have a toddler… OH MY GOSH. Hat’s off… LB will do great wherever you take her. She’ll have a blast!
See? Warm fuzzies abound. I want to pack you all up and carry you around in my pocket.
That’s weird, isn’t it? It is.
OMG- I am so with you. Not the nausea part, and good riddance to that horrible mistress, but the tired, so tired part. Still want to go out, just. can’t. seem. to. do. it. In the immortal words of Joss Whedon- Grr, Argg. Oh, gotta run- make that waddle- the baby just fell asleep, and you know what that means- naptime, oh sweet, sweet naptime. And people? You mean we should be seeing people other than the husband, the first-born and the nurses and docs doing my pre-natal care? Ha ha ha. Oh, wait that could be a good thing.
I so hear you on this. I get to this crazy place sometimes where I just need a little space and some quiet and to do NOTHING. And with two kids… sigh. So hard to do.
I’ve been trying to figure this out as well, trying to decide if school for my 3.5yo is the issue or daycare for the younger or what? We have no money, so a lot of it isn’t an issue since we can’t afford school or daycare. And then I worry I’ll feel like a failure if I am a SAHM and I feel overwhelmed…
Can of worms, much?
Yeah. It’s in the air, yo.
We love you.
i love that 2nd picture of you looking down, it is SUCH a great profile shot!
you’ll be go going in no time i bet