Wow, I’m not even sure I wanted to touch this one, but I guess I need to. Maybe it’s just the counselor in me. Anyway. No matter what you belive, I believe or anyone else: you are a good person. How can any God, (your’s, mine or there’s) ask for anything more? Keep doing the things you believe to be right and the rest will fall into place. Eventually. I know that doesn’t really help for ‘I need answers NOW!’ but its the best I’ve got. Hang in there and you remain in my prayers.