Mrs. Flinger: Based on a True Story

Parenting Tip 101: Consistency and Realism 01/Aug/2010

#Life#Those Little People

Mr. Flinger: “If you don’t stop yelling in there, we’re going to send you outside to play all day and not let you in. We’ll put food in a dog dish and you can eat out there.”

Me: “Let’s make realistic threats to the children. We don’t own a dog dish.”

Mr. Flinger: “You’re right. Sorry. A BOWL.”

Read more

Just Add Spandex 28/Jul/2010

#Life#Best Of

The children are going to a Vacation Bible School this week to learn about Egypt, Some Old Dude and Eat Lots Of Candy and Eat Lots More Candy and sing some songs and Eat More Candy. At least, this is as reported by my oldest.

No, we are not religious, or rather, not in the traditional “there is a God” sort of way. But rather, I am deeply religious in the “there is cheap child care” sort of a way. And that, friends, is Heaven.

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According to my daughter, it’s not a terribly religious experience anyway. Some old dude walked through a sea a long time ago and LOOK I GOT SKITTLES, MOMMY.

It is during this... Read more

I’m like twenty percent Jesus 26/Jul/2010

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“You’re going to do what?”

“I’m going to eat less than 15 grams of sugar for ten days,” I reply exasperated. It’s the second conversation like this in as many minutes.

“Why ten days?”

“It’s all I can promise I might commit to.”

“You are honestly going to last ten days? .... “

“Hey, look, if Jesus can go in to the desert for 40 days without food or water, I can do ten days without sugar.”

“So, what you’re saying is, you’re like twenty percent Jesus.”

“If you want to call me... Read more

So, yea, I’m not going to BlogHer this year 25/Jul/2010

It is a purely financial decision, I keep telling myself. One that does not mean I am not loved by dozens of tons of ten people. It is not that I am not wanted, just that I can not, in no way at all, afford New York City right now. Like OMG NEW YORK CITY! Oh, but god, I want to be there.

So very fucking much.

This year it is not in the cards. They layoff, the house(s), the bills, the move. There is no single way I can justify NEW YORK when I’m hoping to hit Leiden and Germany in another month. No way. Just. None.

Even if my mid-life crisis yells at me to JUSTFUCKINGGO.

Which is what it does. Daily.

I was supposed to Read more

Turn around and take a step forward 24/Jul/2010

#Balance#Life#Getting to know me

As the closing song fills the screen of “180 Degrees South,” several quotes come to mind. I grab my old book, “Buddhism Plain and Simple.” As most of my other inspiring books, it too, has passages underlined with notes in the margins. I find the few I am looking for.

From the film, Yvon says, “The hardest thing in the world is to simplify your life,... Read more

Living Ashram, Living Here 22/Jul/2010

#Balance#Life#Best Of

God he is slow. Why is he going so slow? He is old. He can not drive well, as indicated by the dangling Handicap sign from his rear view mirror. This should be a clue to me to back off. He is trying. He is my elder. But he is making me late to Yoga.

And ohmygod I can not miss Yoga. Not today. Not today.

It becomes nearly comical as he pumps his breaks slowing to 25mph down the 35mph hill. COOOMMEEOONNN I groan. “Just put it in third gear, buddy. You can do it”. I’m coaxing him from my own vehicle not far enough back from his. I just want him to go. JUST GO.

If I wasn’t so irritated, I would chuckle when he stops for right on red. He does not go. He will not chance it. Even if it is his right-of-way.

Suddenly I’m remembering... Read more

A tale of a mid-life crisis at thirty-four part 2 20/Jul/2010

#Travel#Life

Part One Here

“Life is pain, Highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something.”—The Princess Bride

I am an obvious romantic. Spontaneous to a flaw at times. These are not new traits, but rather old traits finally given the freedom to come bubbling back to the surface.

This morning it hits me: I am nearly three... Read more

Cop out post relating to Rocket science by @thicket 16/Jul/2010

Perfect hardboiled eggs

Put (*cough*...farm fresh) eggs in pan, add cold water to an inch above them.
Bring to water to a gentle boil and keep that going for ONE MINUTE ONLY.
Turn heat off and cover your pot for SIX MINUTES ONLY.
Plunge eggs into ice cold water, repeat when water heats up from eggs.

The yolk should not be grey on the outside. The inner core of the yolk should be slightly darker and moister than the outside. That my friends is a delectable hardboiled egg.

*I have tried vingar in the boiling water to make hardboiled eggs peel better, I have never noticed a difference. The ease of peeling an egg seems to be how old the egg is, we use very fresh... Read more

In Flight: A tale of a mid-life crisis at thirty-four 15/Jul/2010

#Travel

A truth I’ve known about myself for years: I have a very strong flight instinct. Some people stay and fight, some people flee. I am of the latter.

I’d make a fantastic bird.

“We can lift ourselves out of ignorance, we can find ourselves as creatures of excellence and intelligence and skill. We can be free! We can learn to fly!” - Jonathan Livingston Seagull.

There is a culmination of events recently taken place that leads me back to this instinct. When trying to remember exactly what happened, or when perhaps, I can only begin a long list of items bringing me to this truth:... Read more

It’s funny, the things you regret 11/Jul/2010

We got married on the top of a small mountain on a tiny island off the north-western corner of the “lower forty-eight” states. My dress was twenty dollars from Ross and I wore my favorite combat boots I purchased at a consignment store for six dollars. It was November and a tiny group of our closest friends stood outside in the freezing cold with us.

I have never, once, ever regretted not having a big fancy white-dress wedding.

Ever.

With increasing frequency, however, the subject of my Dissertation has entered casual conversation. I submitted a proposal I still have a passion for, so much so that when a poor soul asks me about it I launch in to an entire discussion until their eyes glaze over and they begin to drool. It’s a great... Read more