UPDATE TO Mrs. Flinger October 16, 2015
Because the Universe has a wicked sense of humor, after this delcaration, my blog threw up all over my last upgrade.
So I'm starting over using Craft. Turning 40 and kid entering Jr High next year, sometimes it's just time for a change. These archives will still exist in the way the last child goes off to college and their room is the same for 20 years, but it's just time to move forward.
Can I tell you something? Jul 16, 2005
I came to Borders to work. I have
five websites to do. I really want to work. I have ideas, I’m excited to work for these gals, I love it. But seriously? I’m totally unable to do it. I’m on the verge of tears for the third day in a row. I’m so emotional and crazy in my brain. Crazy. Like, “My god, remember PPD? Remember???” I was just on Mama-C-Ta’s site and couldn’t help but tear up at her new lil’ boy. I don’t want that. I know I know! It hit me.. Post Partum Depression. Remember those first few days home? Remember crying for weeks? Remember how horrible I felt? OOOHHHHH, GOOOOOOOOOOOOOODDDDDDDDD.
Can’t I just fast forward until the third month? Everything was so much better then. Of course, I’d also sought help and was finally starting to come back to myself. It’ll be different this time, right? It’ll be better, right? I know more, right? I can find help, I can learn from the past, I can be more calm and aware and ready for the challenges, right?
All of this and the test isn’t even positive yet. Now excuse me, I need some chocolate and a kleenex.
Not-so-trashy book club: Book #2 and other questions… Jul 16, 2005
It’s out, y’all! Are you ready? I haven’t purchased my copy yet, but we’re ready to read Harry Potter book #6.
I can’t remember who all said they want to join so comment here and I’ll add you to the list on the menu——>
And.. I have a question about our last book that everyone can participate in (not just those that read it)...
I’m not a doctor Jul 15, 2005
I’m so freakin’ tired. LB’s teeth are coming in and I’m tired and emotional and a wreck. My great friend Traci asked if I really think I’m pregnant. “Honestly?” I said, “I always think I’m pregnant.”
So do I think I’m over thinking everything? Of course. Will I stop? No. All I know is that people try for months and months when they’re ovulating and don’t get pregnant. Why would one or two tries in a couple of days clinch the deal? Ya know? I’m a fool to think I’m just *that* easy. Or, I’m a fool to think I’m not.
At any rate, I’ve been having fantastic tired bitch fests with Rbelle. And, I’d tell you all about it, but she did a much better job. Go read for yourself. And yea, that’s exactly how I feel, too. It’s so nice to find people who get it. (And who can say it much better than *I* could.)
Super Quick Question Jul 14, 2005
Were you super dizzy ever when you were pregnant? Like at first? Anyone?
A topic to ponder.. not really, but I am.. Jul 13, 2005
So, I was chatting with Mrs. Belle and Yankeebelle about tattoos. And as we’re talking, even though I don’t have one, I realize how fun it is to hear the story behind why/when/where people got theirs. Yankebelle has a great story. I, on the other hand, am trying to drink all the beer before the “frisbeefetus” (named by Rbelle) implants. I think i have a week, no?
So.. tattoos, you in or out? Got ‘em? Want ‘em? If so what are they? (this is one of those “let your panties fly in the wind” type posts. You know.. let it all out, y’all.)
Baby Weight and Baby Waiting Jul 12, 2005
Yey me! I’m officially only 6 pounds away from pre-prego! I even put away all my maternity clothes yesterday. (I’ve been wearing them ‘cause they’re comfy and all.) Of course you know what this means, don’t you?
You know, I had PPD pretty dang bad. I did. It was ugly, dark, and horrible. I would go to bed bawling. “I hate my life,” I used to tell Mr. Flinger. Lately I can barely remember those days. My girl makes me laugh more than she makes me cry and thankyouverymuch Celexa, but mommy amnesia is *so* bad I don’t even mind if I do “happen” to get pregnant now. Worse things could happen.
(I mean, I could get a chain letter in my email box. Now THAT would suck. ::ahem:: )
I remember now why we never have sex Jul 11, 2005
It’s 1:14 am. Have been awake now for 4 hours AFTER going to bed “on time.”
And.. this is going to be WAY TMI.. but.. I’m ovulating. AND. we.. uh.. didn’t “worry” about that fact.
Only, I sorda kinda am now.
You know how I wonder if I’m pregnant EVERY STINKIN’ MONTH even if it’s not really possible? I wonder what I’ll do this month? Probably pee on a positive pregnancy test or something totally brilliant like that.
Spank my Funky Ass Music CD Jul 10, 2005
What would you put on a mix titled, “Spank my Funky Ass”?
So far I have Hollaback girl. And. that’s. it.
Apparently, I’m lacking in the “Spank my Funky Ass” kind of music.
On a side note, how many times in one post can I say “Spank my Funky Ass”?
Trashy Summer Book Club: First meeting Jul 10, 2005
Ok, y’all! What did ya think of Hypocrite in a Poofy White Dress?