Mrs. Flinger: Based on a True Story

An Ode to My Friend MIchelle: On Her Birthday 20/Aug/2009

#Side Notes

There once was a girl named Michelle
She was leading a mom group quite well
We met at a date
I was, as usual, late
From hiking in frozen hell

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It’s been nearly three years since we met
We’ve done a lot of stuff I can’t forget
Over the years we did hang
We talked of politics and wang
And watched our hair go from blonde to brunette

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There was the time we went for that run
Carrying a pineapple the size of the sun?
Or that time in San FranRead more

Because sometims all programming needs is a rap 20/Aug/2009

#She's Gone Geek Again

*For Nick. Who is also a Cracker.

OOP Based Roughly on the OPP rap by Naughty By Nature.
Nerded up by me.


OOP how can I explain it
I’ll take you frame by frame it
To have y’all jumpin’ shall we singin’ it
O is for Object O is for Oriented
The last P…well…that’s not that simple
It’s code and jive and variables like strings
It’s catching exceptions and return theresult.toString()
There are functions and methods, classes too
You instantiate an object, yea you know what to do
Bust it

Chorus:
You down with OOP (Yeah you know me) 3X
Who’s down with OOP (Every last geek)
You down with OOP... Read more

Layoffs 18/Aug/2009

#Family Life

I’m handing out pink slips.

Tiny pink slips to parts of the list, the giant list of “things I do.”

Tiny pink slips to excuses.

Tiny pink slips to not setting expectations.

Tiny pink slips to missing out on field trips.

Tiny pink slips to quick dinners and faster bed times.

Tiny pink slips to the constant glow of the computer screen.

At the end of the day I often hear, “but you’re your own boss,” and I puzzle. I am?

No.

I have people, clients, friends, websites. I have a husband who enjoys seeing me and children who need me.

I am my own boss but I share the load.

And these people don’t let me lose focus.

Read more

Stage 2: Inspiration 16/Aug/2009

#The Liberal Years

The continued story of how I decided to live barefoot:
Prefix: The Acorn and Me
Stage 1: Stage 1: Realization

Through the year and a half I was in Texas, a dynamic shift occurred in both my physical self, my group of friends, and my relationship with God. I began the year teaching preschool at a non-denominational church with every intention to get a master’s degree in Elementary Education. The experiences I had that year led to my rebellion. “Rebellion” that is.

As I processed the difference between my home in Bellingham, the mountains and parks, and my new home in... Read more

Thirty Days is a really really really long time 15/Aug/2009

#Side Notes

It’s hard enough to hit a goal of “doing pilates/yoga for thirty days” without other stuff getting in the way. It’s hard enough to tell yourself that on this lunch break you will spend the first 45 minutes of that hour in downward dog watching your arms shake while you hold your tummy in tight and will yourself to be stronger, leaner, meaner. It’s hard enough to choose to twist your body and flex your ab muscles (wait, ARE those ab muscles?) instead of grabbing a coffee and working.

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So when my ovaries grew to the size of a small state and began to ache, I mean, explode, I knew my plans were for not. Of course, I... Read more

The Brand of Me 13/Aug/2009

#Family Life

It’s been coming to this for a long time, this merging of me vs me. I’ve pretended to be different: Professional Me and Personal Me. But honestly? I am only one person, not two threaded halves.

I am a multitude of rolls, but I am just me. I am as transparent and as open as anyone can be, equally giving way to hurt and laughter and insecurities and strength. I’m open to accepting new ideas, I love my family and my work and I give people the benefit of the doubt to an almost gullible level.

I am what I am and that’s all that I am. (Picture me giving you the pop-eye here. Or, in my case a “Pirate Eye.”)

Eaaeyyyyyy

It sounds old and cliche, but it’s taken me six years of Internet Identity to figure out that I’m... Read more

Hidden (or not so much) messages of Motherhood 10/Aug/2009

#Family Life

Hidden (Or not so much) Messages from Mrs. Flinger on Vimeo.

(Read more

Ellis 09/Aug/2009

#The College Angsty Years

I have a sound clip from 1997 that features my college roommates and I interviewing each other on “what we wanted to be doing in five years.” I’ve stumbled across that clip a few times since graduation, always giggling to myself and wondering if any of the other girls thought about those goals.

Us_June97_2
(1997)

“I’ll probably be teaching” G stated, matter of fact.
(She was.)

“I’ll be hiking or something,” Nicole mused. (She was.)

“I’ll be servicing... Read more

In the quest of the perfect eyebrow 08/Aug/2009

#Side Notes

I only started plucking my eyebrows in my late twenties. As in VERY late twenties. As in, I was already a mom and labeled thus, “mother plucker” my Mr. Flinger.

When it comes to beauty, I’m at a loss. Makeup? Learning how to apply that still. Hair? Well. I can blow dry! But as my friend Michelle stated in exasperation, “You don’t even have the RIGHT kind of flat iron.” I didn’t realize they went out of style. And apparently, I have an old style, the big one? With the FLAT IRON?

:: shrugs ::

Since 2004 when I started the quest for the perfect eyebrow I have done a lot of research. I’ve... Read more

Words We Aren’t Allowed to Say 05/Aug/2009

#Family Life

Words. They can be powerful. They can be meaningless. They can send chills down your spine. They can go in one ear and out the other.

Perplexing, yes?

Or is that just me getting all giddy to use a word like “PERPLEXING.”

Probably.

So why is it that we have all these “RULES” about words? They’re just… words. Meaningless until someone attaches a feeling around it.

We’ve called my daughter, “Stinker” her whole life. We’ve called her “Pooper” “Pooper scooper” (honestly, I have no idea why, but it’s a term of endearment, I swear) and “Stinker Butt.” We rarely call each other our real names in this house at all, actually. “Read more