Don’t even get me started on the safety warnings!
Adorable pictures of the kiddos!
Seriously? As in ... Seriously? You’re kidding, right?
These are the first thoughts that ran through my head upon hearing about the Bumbo Seat Recall. I have a Bumbo Seat. We love the Bumbo Seat. Baby O sits up in his Bumbo Seat. It’s a blue, soft, squishy seat of wonderfulness.
Baby O give it a thumb up. Or down. He’s really not sure what those things are on the end of his hands yet…
Here’s the thing. Apparently if you place a child on top of a table or other high surface and leave them THEY MIGHT FALL OFF.
Let me say that again.
If you leave a child on top of something high? THEY MIGHT FALL OFF.
Dude. That’s news? Shit. Really?
What’s next? BEDS?
(I can read it now… Mother leaves infant on bed. She leaves him unattended to have a beer in the bar downstairs. During this time the infant falls OFF the bed. Beds are now being recalled. Please proceed to turn in all mattress and bedding to your local government agency.)
Let’s address the issue here, shall we?
If you buy hot coffee? It will burn your crotch if you slosh it out of the cup. Do not sue McDonalds or Starbucks or whomever. All we end up with are really dumb warning on coffee cups. “Content is Hot” Fuckme. Yathink?
If you leave your child alone on top of a high surface (in a rocker? A bumbo? A Car seat?) he or she may fall off. It’s called gravity. Do not sue gravity.
If you give your child a small object to play with, they will eat it. Or put it up their nose. Or butt. Please do not sue the toy. Sue your child for causing you all that stress and gray hair.
Or! I know!
Use your common sense!
I’m a Mother For Using Common Knowledge EverywheRe
Join me in this movement, won’t you?
Together, we can make a difference.
(And, for the record, I do set my child on the table. I just take pictures of him up there and make sure I’m totally drunk and stoned when I’m the only one home.)
(And if you believe that, please come buy my pony.)
(Just don’t sue it when it shits in your yard.)
Don’t even get me started on the safety warnings!
Adorable pictures of the kiddos!
Totally hysterical. I’ve always been a Mother Effer. Always! Well, almost always.
I’ve never been so sad NOT to be a mother. “Woman F.U.C.K.E.R.” just doesn’t say the same thing, does it?
Hilarious post! I totally agree - it reminds me of when the bath rings were recalled here because kids were being left alone in them and drowning. Sheesh people - use a little common sense already.
And my Bumbo came plastered with warnings all over it to not place it on an elevated surface (I guess me placing it on top of the gas stove wasn’t such a good idea then - kidding, kidding). Is it still necessary to really recall it?
seriously? a recall for that?OH MY. People are idiots. Well then you know what? They need to recall highchairs because it so wasnt my fault I left my child in it unstrapped and he jumped out this morning. They make them too tall and the straps are too big anyway. DOH! Babytrend has a lawsuit on their hands now! ROTFL!
OK, people who are so stupid that they can’t use one of those things properly, should not be allowed to BREED. Sorry, my communist side was showing.
I hate the lawsuits bred from stupidity, and I even had people argue with me about my post way back when bitching about people who sue Burger King because they ate there a lot and got fat. WTF? For real? You think people should win a lawsuit because they’re too stupid to shut their piehole?
Anyway, awesome post and I wholeheartedly agree. If these suckers had been been when I was birthin babies, I’d totally have stuck all four of mine in one.
My sisterinlaw has one of these that they use with their baby. DUH the baby could fall, if they are on something other than the floor.
I will never understand, its like the curling iron that has a warning on it not to insert into any bodily orifice BECAUSE IT COULD RESULT IN BURNS. The things is, you know someone had to have actually DONE THAT or they wouldn’t feel the need to post a notice saying NOT TO.
The problem is that it has become so easy to sue a company, that people just want to make a quick buck. Let’s just hope the use the money for that child’s college education…probably not.
Love the pictures too!
My sentiments exactly. I was going to post about it over at my place. I may still, but I will definitely be stealing the button.
Common Sense people. We heart our Bumbo too (which we use ON THE TABLE)! Ahhh…revoke my Mommy license.
PS. I’m digging Baby O’s stretched out toes in that second shot. Gideon still keeps his curled up.
did you know that if you have a recalled chair they will give you a sticker to put on your chair that says “dumb ass, don’t put on an elevated surface”?
Amen Sister! And I also want to apologize for putting your baby on your island in the Bumbo yesterday.
I am going to try to be a better Mother F.U.C.K.E.R. from now on!
You are funny.
Dude, I felt the same way about these warnings. My baby managed to flip herself out of her Bumbo seat, which, thankfully, was on the floor, so no real harm done. I have a friend (who is smart with fancy degrees and everything) who regularly put her son in his Bumbo on high surfaces. Like a bench. Over concrete. Makes me cringe to think about it. So, um, apparently some people need their attention drawn to certain should-be-obvious safety issues.
I definitely needed this info. Thank you. I will no longer be an idiot.
You know it’s one thing to put paint kids toys with lead paint (or to paint anything for that matter with lead paint), but seriously people. I hate this litigious society we’ve become. Everyone wants to blame someone else. Can anyone take responsibility for themselves and their actions anymore??
Sorry. I’m totally with you. I’ll get down off my soapbox now.
I want that graphic but I might get kicked off the Christian Women Online Blogroll!
I ~heart~ you, Mrs. Flinger
COULD HE BE ANY MORE ADORABLE?
yeah…and there is a warning also not to lift lawnmowers by the hands during operation.
This looks like a great invention. Hope would have liked it too, particularly if I had put it on the counter top…
What cute kids you have.
It really is just common sense, but I was totally surprised at just how early the whole arching the back move started. We had to retire ours for that very reason.
That might just be the best acronym ever.
Next they’re going to start recalling the babies.
I couldn’t agree more, and I’ll happily join in your movement. Nothing makes my ass twitch more than this kind of blatant stupidity.
I’ll snag that graphic and display it proudly, if’n that’s okay with you. I’ll put it on my own server and link back to this post.
I couldn’t agree with you more. I would love to use the graphic, but I’m level-3-profanity-free at my blog….and somehow, the acronym doesn’t work as well with Mother FREAKER. Sigh.
Mel- What is level 3 profanity free? There are different levels?
Um, yeah, both my girls like to kick out of the bumbo, they love to move. Also, since they both have big legs I think the tightness/ restricted movement irritates them. They have to be in the mood for it.
Oh, and Mrs. Flinger? I’m going to have to sue you for making me laugh so hard I have strained my stomach muscles. It’s not my fault they’re all weak and stretched out… Wait a minute, I think I’ll sue my babies, too. See you in court!!!
LMAO thank you so much I need a laugh this morning.
There are some people out there who are stupid enough to place their child in one of those seats, on a table, and walk away or not pay attenton to them. I was at luch a week or so ago and witnessed the stupidity of some people. A mother and grandmother had a little one, maybe 7-8 months old, in one of those seats. They had place the child on the table and pretty much ignored him after that. The child was sucking on the salt shaker and throwing packets of sugar and sweet & low all over the place. They did not notice a thing. Scary!
Hahaha! I also wonder who in hell is so stupid as to need some of the warnings that I see. One that gets me is don’t heat baby bottles in the microwave because it heats unevenly. I heat them in the microwave all the time, and then I shake it up or stir it, check it with my finger, shake it again, ya know, like, making sure it’s OK to put in baby’s mouth. But I know some people can’t be counted on to be Mother Fuckers.
The sad thing is that, since injuries have obviously happened which made the recall necessary, this means that there are a bunch of babies out there with parents negligent enough to do something just that stupid, and probably worse. This is so depressing.
I had the exact same reaction. What was worse was the FOUR HUNDRED PEOPLE who called to tell me that ack! the Bumbo! it has been recalled! without reading the article that said the recall is only going to put a SAFETY STICKER on the Bumbo and GIVE IT BACK TO THE STONED IDIOTS WHO DON’T KNOW HOW TO USE IT IN THE FIRST PLACE.
They can pry my Bumbo out of my cold dead hands.
You know, houses should be recalled too. Think of all the things that could happen inside a house… why there are pointy things! and water! and bumbo seats!!
I thought the same thing when I read about this. It is sad how many people go through life with no common sense. It would be funny if it wasn’t children getting hurt because of their stupidity.
(hehehe!) Love this post!
We don’t have a bumbo, but my daughter LOVED her bouncer. ... One day my mother-in-law was over visiting and commenting on the bouncer, “what a great invention! especially because you could put it on the counter when you’re cooking or on the dryer when you’re folding laundry or on the table when you’re eating, and she’ll just sit there and bounce all over the place!”
Before she said that, I thought the warning on the tag (you know, the one that says “do not use on elevated surfaces”) was a little over-zealous.
Stupid people like this are the ones the directions on shampoo is for.
When I read about the recall, I was thinking what you wrote…..but not nearly as funny…or as nice…..
Good heavens…next it will be a penis recall…have you seen the damage that can be done with one of those things???
I wrote about the Bumbo recall on my blog too; wrote a love letter to Bumbo. I still love mine! Just wish parents would pay attention to the warnings so we wouldn’t get recalls on so much stuff! Thanks for the laugh today!
I read about this yesterday- I could not believe (okay I could, but I didn’t want to) the stupidity of the thing! You don’t have to read the warning label to SEE that the thing obviously could fall over if the kid was moving around enough. The article I read said 4 skull fractures and like 28 other various injuries have been reported.
I am so tired of hearing about recalls that have everything to do with the stupidity of PEOPLE!!
Your acronym is too hilarious.
I keep re-reading your post and laughing every time. LOVE the Movement!
My favorite is the “Caution: Beverage is Hot” warnings. “Yeah,” I think, “it darn well better be hot!” It’s COFFEE, idiots.
Recalling beds. Houses. You people are awesome.
I think the problem is that the warning that is already on the back uses too many big words. It reads in part: “Never leave your baby unattended as the seat is not designed to be totally restrictive and may not prevent release of your baby in the event of vigorous movement.” People stupid enough to put their kid in a Bumbo seat on a table and leave them alone will read that and think “huh?” What it needs to say is “Yo Dumbass! Your kid can, like, get out of this seat so like pay attention to him or something.”
Seriously. They’re recalling the Bumbo Seat because adults are stupid. Shouldn’t they be recalling the adults not the seats, as they are clearly the faulty ones.
People are just fucking dumb and those dumb people ruin it for the rest of us not quite as dumb people out there. End of story.
Baby O is too cute for words.
Holey shit that is the best button ever in my whole life. When can I buy the T shirt?
Hah! Sorry, nothing wittier than that today.
They’re not actually recalling the seat. Just the instructions and safety warnings that come with the seat. I know. Huh? A recall on instructions? So I’m supposed to take back my instructions and get new ones?
You mean I’m not supposed to put my kid in a bumbo and then put him on top of the fridge? I’m glad I went and got those new instructions!
You’ve inspired a movement: http://www.kristinabrooke.org/2007/10/26/join-the-movement/
Thank you so much!
Okay seriously I have wondered if they bumbo could be bitten with those teeny sharp teeth and be choked on.
I am hoping my lawsuit against the corn growers of Canada goes forward. From the time Qgirl stuck a kernel up her nose…
PS He so had your eyes!
you are fucking hilarious.
you write what we all think.
Damn he’s cute!
I come out of lurkdom b/c it’s just all too damn funny. I do enjoy reading your blog Mrs. Finger. And quite frankly I’m absolutely loving all the profanity. I so need to cuss more often & get these f’in Laurie Berkner songs out of my head!
Love the badge! Yes - common sense rules.
I can’t believe they’re recalling an item that they state is dangerous when misused. Tons of things are dangerous when misused. That’s why I stopped using the lawn mower to cut my hair. And then there are the warnings… I bought some diaper pins a few months ago and I kid you not the warning read, “Keep out of baby?s reach. Contains a functional sharp point.”
I am loving your blog and this post as well as your photos!
You seem to be having alot of fun with life. Happiness is so cool! You wear it well!
I’ll be back!
Ha! It’s true. People are surprisingly dumb. We had a Bumbo and I put it on the table during dinner because my son couldn’t stand to be away from the family while we ate. BUT? I didn’t leave him up there unattended. It’s just common sense, which seems to be in short supply these days.
OMG. I LITERALLY SPIT TEA OUT MY NOSE READING THIS! HILARIOUS… YET SO TRUE! I love it. I’m now adding you to one of my favorites! thankyouverymuch!
I swear we are regressing!~ NOT progressing. We have to warn people that our coffee cups are hot, write labels on our plastic bags so people don’t let their kids use them as wigs, and now recall a WONDERFUL invention b/c someone was so stupid to walk away from their wobbly baby on a table! GAH!
HILARIOUS POST mamma!
I like to get trashed and let Mason (5) teach Terri (16 MO) how to cook! You should try it!
Cracks me up b/c there’s the “ad by Google” on your sidebar links to two sites for buying a Bumbo!
Funny stuff, Mrs. F!
oh my GAWD, you got me laughing! i had to read this to hubby, because we were having the same conversation a couple of hours ago…how stupid would you have to be to leave your child up on a high table…unattended?????
i am proud to say that we’ve had our bumbo for two years, and both of our boys have escaped unharmed…‘cause i have common sense!
hilarious, as always!
You are too hilarious.
Seriously, what WILL they think of next?
My Bumbo (and it’s nifty little companion the Bumbo tray) are the best things I have had as a mommy to an infant. We are on our second go-round with it, and yeah, I’m guilty of placing it on our coffee table or on my mom’s counter. I am always right there with him (like I was with Southern Girl last year), and I am willingly doing so even though I read the instructions that said not to place on an elevated surface or in water, yada blah whatever.
How ridiculous that in our society today, stupidity is constantly being rewarded. I’m all for the mother f.u.c.k.e.r movement! Rock on mother f.u.c.k.e.rs!
My first thought when I saw this recall was “File under: No shit, Sherlock.”
People can be such idiots.
What? I didn’t know Bumbo had been recalled. I was too busy giving my 2 month old the dry cleaning bag to play with.
How much do I love you!?
A LOT! That’s how much1
We have that same bumbo! Ella pops right out of every facking day!
How about another sentence ending with an exclamation point!
You know when I heard of the recall and the reasons, I was shocked. Why should they recall a products because parents do not use common knowledge.
Life can be dangerous when misused!
OMG! Thank you so much for saying what was on my mind!
It just blew me away when they were being recalled for an additional warning label.
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