I want your opium

Sep 15, 2006

#Social Clutz Loveable Spaz

I’ve talked about how I’ll never win a spelling bee and how I over use spell check almost to a flaw. Not that it catches all my typos, mind you, but at least they are spelled correctly.

You all have this story, I’m sure. You do, don’t you? The one where an email gets sent out to the entire office with some misspelled work that spell check caught and changed? Or you turn in your thesis to your advisory committee and on page 289 you have the word incontinence when talking about student perception’s of online education. Because, you know, you meant inconsistent but spell check guess incontinence and it was late and you spent four months on that damn paper and by page 289, you really didn’t notice.

Everyone have that story or is it just me? Me? Ok then.

Mr. Flinger always brings home the most fun work emails. His asian co-worder wrote a lovely letter regarding some concrete something or other and stated, after a long winded paragraph “Bra Bra Bra” in place of BlahBlahBlah. I have numerous emails from students that I’ve forwarded to coworkers because I giggle so hard I spit a little on my keyboard. And then there’s the email Mr. Flinger forwarded last night.

To: the entire office that covers six states and two countries
Re: Your Input

BlhablHblahBlahBlah. Long winded stuff I really don’t understand dealing with construction (I think) or other things. And then here it is. All by itself. “I’d like your opium.”

One can only assume as meant opinion. But picture the president of the company getting an email: I’d like your opium.

Awesome. And I wasn’t even the one to do it (this time).


  1. Yep.  Been there, done that.  My work e-mail has decided that everytime I type we, as in me and others, I mean wee.  I send MANY e-mails to higher-up suggesting that we wee.  I’m sure it will take me staight to the top!

    By Pam on 2006 09 15

  2. That is soooooo funny.  Do they even do drug testing?

    I’ve done it, I’ve been famous for it, and I totally had to turn it into a joke b/c I couldn’t stop doing it.  No. matter. how. hard. I. tried. and. reviewed. over. and. over. obsessively.

    By Piglet on 2006 09 15

  3. Just kidding on the drug testing question, I realize that it meant to be “opinion”.

    By Piglet on 2006 09 15

  4. Oh for an ‘anonymous reply’ button…

    PS I posted my TTC saga on my blog today. Woot!

    By Susie on 2006 09 15

  5. You’d be amazed how often those writing on public health end up having “pubic” in their documents.

    By SaraS-P on 2006 09 15

  6. Oh yeah..done that!  I do the editing for all text in my company.  We did a CD last year and made 10k copies and passed them out at various trade shows.  I looked that thing over sooo many times.  Then, at the last trade show of the year, after giving these to thousands of people, someone comes up to me and points out that the word vertical was misspelled.  It was a BIG word on the front of the CD.  Kicking myself still.

    By Marjorie on 2006 09 15

  7. Hahaha… one of the perks of being a sahm is that I can send out weird things like that and blame it on the kids…

    By lanna on 2006 09 15

  8. I could not stop laughing at this. Sad thing was on the phone with someone and they thought I was laughing at them. :D

    By Fluffy Girl on 2006 09 15

  9. Girl. YOU. crack. me. up.

    I work for a company called the “Foto News” and EVERYTIME I run spell check it always wants to replace “Foto” with “foot.” I just know one of these times its going to happen… FOOT NEWS!

    The joys…
    I know the devil invented Spell Check. However, I think it should have been called “Scans Quickly to Alter Your Uniqueness.”

    I think there are a few words that should be ADDED to the dictionary:

    1. Gawd.
    2. Pfft.
    3. Funner. (Cause it is SO a word!)
    4. Gonna.

    By and rudeness on 2006 09 15

  10. Hasn’t happened to this former 5th grade all-school spelling bee first runner-up, but my fourth graders are famous for selecting more interesting, impressive words as they spell-check their work.  Hilarious!

    By AmyM on 2006 09 15

  11. Too FUNNY!

    Do you watch Headlines every Monday on Jay Leno?  They are too hilarious!!  (mostly are from newspapers or misc items people send in…)  We try to remember to watch it as it is well worth it!

    By Holly on 2006 09 15

  12. One of the reasons I almost never comment on any blog is because after I have written and re-written my two-line masterpiece and then spellchecked it (and all of the revisions) several times it is time to go to bed and I am unsure about whether or not that was really ‘the direction I wanted to go with that comment’.  Bra Bra Bra…

    Hell, at least I never ask for opium.

    By Mama Grouch on 2006 09 15

  13. So, I’m just waking up and when I first read this, I was very confused because I still read it as opinion, both in the post title and in the post itself. I think I need to get some coffee before I continue reading blogs.

    By Jessie on 2006 09 16

  14. My daughter had to write a letter in school last week.  She used spell check. The letter was signed, “Sinisterly Kianna”

    By Jan on 2006 09 16

  15. My old AOL email spell-check changed “Ursula Andress” to “Arousal Undress.” Totally poetic.

    By Max on 2006 09 16

  16. oops. that made me snort a tiny spray of snot on my keyboard.
    now that i’ve wiped it up, i’ll just tell you that i work for the local council in a place called Footscray, but my fingers always type Footscary. the thing is that this is one tough place that people from the rest of our city would be too afraid to visit, so it’s kinda appropriate.

    By J-Le on 2006 09 16

  17. Giggle Giggle wink

    By speechjane on 2006 09 16

  18. did he post a reply, HEY MAN, ME TOO!!??

    I do dictation for my dad’s medical practice, and I accidentally typed “fecal sac” instead of “THECAL sac.”  (talking about the spine)

    yeah, THAT one was great!

    By Little Miss on 2006 09 16

  19. Gaww, I just do that in IRL too.  I’ll mean to say something that will sound nice and out comes the “opium”. 

    Emails?  Fawgetaboutit, I’m all over that.

    By Melissa on 2006 09 16


    I have a friend whose Asian coworker sent out an e-mail to the vast majority of her company with “admenstruation” instead of “administration.” Can’t blame that on spellcheck… talk about “lost in translation”...

    By Kate on 2006 09 16