Jul 30, 2009
As a girl, with a mom of girls, I never truly “got” the Mama’s Boy thing. But it happened before he was born. I thought it was because he was my second born, the baby I could comprehend before I saw him, the kicking that I already understood deep inside my belly.
Now I know it was because of him. Who he is.
I have two children and I connected with them both. I understand my daughter from a “been there” perspective. I can read her and I remember what it was like being a four year old starting ballet. I understand when she just needs time without her younger sibling and I identify with some of her frustrations with school friends.
But my son? My son gets ME. My two year old will ask, “k? Mommy?” If I cough. He will come up and grab my leg on a difficult day and squeeze until my eyes fill with a different type of tear. He will pull his fingers through my hair absentmindedly as we watch Einsteins. He puts one hand on each of my cheeks to turn my head to him so he can kiss my lips goodnight.
His heart is as big as the sun and as warm. Most of the time, barring his two year old genetics, when I ask him to do something he will say, “OK, Mommy!” and he comes to get “screen on!” (Translation: Sunscreen) or “SHOES! ME DO IT!” or “HALP?”
He pats me on the back when he hugs me and his tiny hands make me forget what I was doing.
My son is growing up to be a man I will be proud of. He has his daddy’s compassion and logic. He’s all smiles and laughter and blocks and cars. He snuggles a blanket and a WWE figure at night.
He is boy. He is man. He is mine.
The day he meets a woman who he can care for, I will welcome her in to our lives. I will be happy for my son as he continues in to his own life, as he walks in to his own future. But I will tell her as they dance their first dance as husband and wife to be good to him.
I know he will be good to her.
It’s who he is.
Oh my! You nearly made me cry! I can definitely relate to everything you just wrote. I am raising two men (one 2 and one 5) and they squeeze my heart every day with the little things they do and the small glimpses of who they are becoming. Your pride in your wonderful children is evident in your beautiful writing. I have just discovered the world of blogs, and naturally stumbled on the PW’s stuff, and I found your blog mentioned there. After scanning your posts, I can tell you that I will be a regular reader from now on. Thanks for sharing your insights and experiences. You are an inspiration.
By Nicole on 2009 07 30
Just stumbled upon your site via - well, you know…PW.
Anyway - this makes my eyes swell with tears. I am at that stage in motherhood where it just doesn’t seem possible that my 3 little men are almost actual men - how did 20 years fly by? How can they be 20, 19 and 16 yrs old. But I say a little prayer of thanks as they still hug me and tell me they love me with no reservation, no “moment” to qualify the anouncment - they are still “mine” and I think always will be. I know it will happen and I will be so happy for them when they find that someone special to take the #1 woman in their life position - I’ll just hope as you do that that person will be as good to them as they are to her.
Thanks and so happy to find you!
By Emmie on 2009 07 30
he is so darling. While I’m a mother, I’m not really one of those people that swoon over an adorable child. However, I am swooning over your little guy. He is so sweet and adorable.
By Amanda of Shamelessly Sassy on 2009 07 30
You just made me smile. Aw.
By schmutzie on 2009 07 30
What a cute little man!!
By Heather on 2009 07 30
My 2 year old does some of the same things. The hands on the face for kisses, the back pats. My goal is to keep him on this path. I love having a mama’s boy. As much as I’d love having a girly girl, a mama’s boy is so very wonderful.
By Lesha on 2009 07 30
Awww, you gotta love sons They definitely have a special connection with their moms
By Jeanette on 2009 07 30
Delurking….Just like you, I have a 4 year old daughter and a 2 year old son. Your posts about your children often bring tears to my eyes. They mirror my thoughts exactly, only I don’t have the talent to put the thoughts into words. Thank you.
By Dorie on 2009 07 30
Oh my, oh my, oh my, so sweet. I have twins—girl and boy—and everyone tells me…oh you have a girl, and a boy. How lucky—-more that I have a daughter—they say, boy if you had two boys you would probably be trying for that girl huh…
What they don’t understand is that it is equally as fulfilling to me to watch and see my little boy turn into this wonderful little man—as it is to watch my daughter turn into a lovely young lady. I cherish my son’s hugs and kindness…and I know that he will pass this same kindness onto one lucky lady someday and I will sleep well at night knowing that I had something to do with that!
By Tracie on 2009 07 30
Oh! I didn’t know I was going to cry here today… Sometimes I think about being a mother-in-law someday. We will teach them to be good men & to find good women… they will not settle for less! Hugs…
By Marie on 2009 07 30
I have one of those boys. It’s nice
By Miss Grace on 2009 07 30
So sweet I’m crying.
By Maria on 2009 07 30
OK, now I KNOW I like this site.
Me: Mom, four (3 boys, oldest girl); Nana (3 girls, oldest boy).
Story: My Sons.
No one told me that you have no choice, you will fall madly and passionately in love with your sons. Don’t get me wrong, the sun rises and sets upon my beautiful daughter. But my sons - they are the world.
They have you from the moment you “know” they are there. They grab your heart and your hand, and lead you to the life of “boys”. Familiar, yet strange. Nothing like what we women were as children: as teens, as young adults, as early parents. They are male, boys, men.
The fearlessness, the abandonment, the unrestrained enthusiasm. Seeing a blur go past my eye as I am hanging laundry on the line - turn my head in time to see the next son jump off the roof of the barn into the loose hay on the ground three stories below. “No worry Mamma” says the 4 year old. “We have our magic capes (bath towels) on!” His baby brother, all of three years and one month, agreeing whole heartedly with violent head bobbing.
Learning to ride a bike - without your help. Building go-carts, blurring death machines - with your help. Telling you their secrets, then no more, then, blessedly again when they are in their late teens. You are Momma, you are “safe”. The girls - they come and go. The smart ones know you trump them, the smart Momma’s know this too, and never pull the trump card.
The pain of boys. Watching from the bleachers as your nine year old son gets the wind knocked out of him at a football game. “DON?T YOU DARE!” growls the man seated next to me as I rise to run to my injured baby. “You will destroy him, he will not be able to hold back the tears if you go down there. He needs to do this, alone!” The coach, evil, maker of men, holds my son’s face mask in his claw, sternly speaking an inch from his nose. I whimper, needing to go to my baby, but stay seated.
Years later, when this baby becomes a father, I tell him of this day. Tell him I can still smell the grass, can still not think about it without my heart jumping to my throat. He pauses, then says “That is one of the steps I had to take to become the man I am now, the man I will be. You did the right thing by staying in the bleachers. You did what was best for ME, not what was best for YOU. Thank you.”
By Bethann on 2009 07 30
This post totally spoke to my soul. My son is the same age and I will bend over backwards any time he asks me for a “Kwess”.
By Fear and Parenting in Las Vegas on 2009 07 30
Great post- he sounds like a sweetie.
I was so scared when I found out I was having a boy. I know so little about them- still think boys are kind of weird. But having a son is great and has definitely opened up fun new world to me. Wouldn’t trade it for anything.
That being said, I’m SO glad my second was a girl. I needed to buy cute baby girl clothes
By Carrie on 2009 07 30
Aw, he’s cute! I have 2 boys of my own. And yeah. They’re pretty great. Exhausting and destructive and stubborn, but great.
By C @ Kid Things on 2009 07 30
What a sweetie! And I love the hair
By Chere on 2009 07 30
Ohhhh I love this post. So much resonates for me and the dynamics with my daughter and son. Reading your post helps me feel a little less guilty about how I love them each so differently. Thank you.
By shriek house on 2009 07 30
I love baby hands holding my face for kisses and the run and hug
makes my entire life
By rachel on 2009 07 30
That post gave me goosebumps, because it’s how I feel about my youngest, too. He heels me everyday, even if he did say Dada, his brother’s name, the dog’s name, and just about everybody else’s name before he ever said “Mama.”
By Jill on 2009 07 30