Jul 29, 2009
**April, 2013** Hello and welcome! If this is your first time here, I’d love to meet you. I’ve recently written about being diagnosed with Adult ADHD, spent much of last year traveling and went back to work full time as a Program Manager for Media at a large global company. My children are 8 and 6 and I love talking to people with similar stories. Be sure to say hi and pull up a chair. I’ll grab the coffee. (Or tea for my UK friends with milk and sugar.)**
I walked in to the keynote, searching the thousands of faces to find “my people.” I wonder in and out of tables bumping in to elbows and computers. I recognize a few features but I continue to bump, walk, bump, walk looking for my table.
I spot the table of women more familiar than their pictures or email addresses. Vivaciously, as only I am known to do, I yell out, “There are MAH BEESHES! Wuz up Mothah Fuckahs!” I glance around the table taking in each face that I adore. I see Angie, Dawn, Molly, Shonda, Sam and Karen and…. who’s this? I don’t recognize the lovely lady in the red hair so poised next to my flamboyant friends. “Hi! I’m Mrs…” It hits me about the same time Angie pipes up, “This is Ree Drummond? THE PIONEER WOMAN.”
There is a silence and my mouth hits the floor.
I stumble over to hug her, gush, possibly lick her feet. She says in her polite southern accent, “I was just admiring your belly.” I laugh as she touches my two year postpartum belly. “This?” I exclaim, “This is old left over from before.” I can tell she feels bad. She recovers and says, “At least yours is in the front, mine is all in the rear.”
I hug her. I could package her up and take her home with me.
At some point during the keynote I look over and she looks as thought she feels just terrible. But! It’s her lucky day! She’s talking to me. Remember? The girl that did the five most stupidest things possible last year at BlogHer? The girl that went up to four, no five, different people thinking they were OTHER people only to get three sentences in before said mistake person clears up my error?
The girl who spilled, and broke, a glass of wine. Totally sober, mind you.
The girl who says all the wrong things at all the wrong times.
The girl who fifteen minutes earlier asked, “Does this dress make me look pregnant?” only to find out, from her idol that yes! Yes it does.
I’ll never wash the dress that Ree touched.
Thankfully Ree is the kind of classy gal that can laugh with me over this. “Remember that time…” I picture saying to her in a year at the next conference where she wins some more big awards. And then I’ll ask when the lady next to me is due. And it’ll be my humiliation.
To everything turn turn turn…
Pictures can be found on Flickr
** update, it happened again. March 2, 2010
Perhaps, she is saying OMG I met Mrs. Flinger!
You know what? I think you are quite the classy girl yourself for being so compassionate about how bad she probably felt.
By Maria on 2009 07 29
so excited to have found your blog through PW. cracking up over this story.
By melissa on 2009 07 29
Found you thru Ree’s blog….you’re very classy…and you’ve got yourself a new reader!
By Renee on 2009 07 29
I totally did that to someone years ago and still feel bad. The only difference? The girl I offended did not even have comfort in knowing it was someone famous like Ree who did it to her.
By Amber's Crazy Bloggin' Canuck on 2009 07 29
I’m with you. I would love for Ree to think I was pregnant if it meant she would pat my belly and post about it on her blog. Absolutely worth it!
By Mindee@ourfrontdoor on 2009 07 29
My thanks to PW for the hook up. Love this story.
By Laurie Mom of 3 on 2009 07 29
It was total friggin hilarity. I started to feel bad for her b/c she felt so bad. I kept assuring you that “it’s only FLINGER! Really! She’s FINE!” She did ask for your email address, but instead, you got a whole PW post. Awesome.
By Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] on 2009 07 29
Well, I saw the lovely Ms. Ree but I had no idea who she was. (Yeah, I’m perverse like that. I also never read “The DaVinci Code.”) No offense to her whatsoever, of course, I just haven’t followed her.
YOU, on the other hand, you were at the top of my “Must Meet” list and I had to restrain myself from not just licking you all over. Or something like that.
By Maura on 2009 07 29
OMG, my heart about broke for Ree when she wrote about this! She is absolutely dyin’ about it. You give such a sweet account of it. ‘Gonna have to bookmark you now, to catch up on everything you get up to!
Ali in Ireland
By Alison Behan on 2009 07 29
Ah, I felt so bad for Ree, then I read yours and that was great! Yep, a new bookmark for me also!
By Tanya on 2009 07 29
Well, you know, we have ALL put our respective feet somewhere. Mouth, Ass. Wherever.
But I am tickled to have found your blog. So freakin; funny!
By Deb from austin on 2009 07 29
I am so glad to finally read your side of the story. Hahaha when Ree mentions you watch out, she’ll crash your server! That is to funny. I love your site, you’ve got another reader.
By Mariah Kimble on 2009 07 29
I laughed so hard, and felt so awkwardly bad for you both I love that it worked out so well though…with you both being fine about it!
And count me in as another new reader, love your blog!
By Chere on 2009 07 29
I couldn’t tell you one way or the other if you looked pregnant because I never got a chance to meet you. And I’m pouting about that right now.
By Chicky Chicky Baby on 2009 07 29
Ree can ask me how many days I’m overdue! if it means all this activity! You are a good sport.
By Jenny on 2009 07 29
I’m so glad all this happened with Ree
only because Now I can read your Blog.
All things happen for a reason..
Lucky me.. Who Knew !!!!
By Wilma Miller on 2009 07 29
I would not wash the dress either! Funny story!
By Spruce Hill on 2009 07 29
You are a class act. What a good heart and sense of humor! I have 3 daughters. #1 looks exactly like me but NOTHING like #2. I still had a pregnant belly after a few weeks of delivering #2, it was so obvious! And yet more than one woman asked me if I adopted #2 and from where!!!! I cried and cursed. #3 looks like #1. Genes…..
By Gina on 2009 07 29
Yaay! Another great blog to put in my reader. What a wonderful close to the story. Thanks for sharing.
By Justopia on 2009 07 29
You got me…a loyal reader from now on. Never knew about you until Ree told the story on her blog. I’ve been there…done that too. *sigh* But I love the story you’ve both told and adore the kindnesses shared.
By Camille on 2009 07 29