One, Two, 1-2-3-4

Aug 16, 2007

#Good News#Social Clutz Loveable Spaz

Please sing in your best country-sounding voice. There needs to be twang. Sadly, every time I try to make “twang” in my head it comes out “Bow Chicka Chicka Bow Bow.” So, go for less porn and more TWANG, ok?

Also, I am completely sober. S-O-B-E-R. I’m like a guy on Alcohol, I couldn’t get it going. But once I got sober, the words just started flowing.

:: ahem ::

I didn't take this photo

Oh! Two Buck Chuck I’m in love with you
You’ve got more spunk than a party shoe
You make me dance with grace and rhythm
When I drink you, I’ve got biorythm
You only cost just two ninety-nine
You are the best thing to happen to wine
Your Cab Sav is red and smooth
if I saw you at a party, I’d make a move
Come live with me the rest of my days
Two buck Chuck, on you I can give b-j’s
So the Mister, he loves you, too
Two Buck Chuck, we’re in love with you

Thank you, Thank you.

This song is brought to you by the number two and the letter O (who gives me plenty of time at 1AM to “sit and think about what I’ve done”)

We’ll be here all week, folks.


  1. I love you.  Wish I could share a bottle of Chuck with you.  Actually, I don’t want to share exactly…we could each have our own bottle. 

    I believe you may have a future in Nashville!

    By Jennifer on 2007 08 16

  2. two buck chuck has such a special place in my heart i get a little tear thinking about it. i have to purchase a case at a time since there isn’t any in my town (wah!). i’m down to my last bottle, how will i survive?

    By Mrs. M on 2007 08 16

  3. That is quality song writing.  I’m glad I’m not the only one who gets crack headed with lack of sleep.  Not that I’m calling you a crack head?!?

    By skyzi on 2007 08 16

  4. You know there’s a contract out there for you some where! (or is it a contract on you? bwah!)

    You nut! wink

    I don’t know Two Buck Chuck. I want to meet him!

    By Marie on 2007 08 16

  5. You crack me up. I’m singing songs over at my place today too. Haven’t had the 2 buck Chuck, but hear good things.

    By *pixie* on 2007 08 16

  6. LOL  I wish you lived next door to me.

    By mdvelazquez on 2007 08 16

  7. That was rather awesome. Except for the fact that my “Twang!” turned into “80s rapper” by the end…

    By Judy on 2007 08 16

  8. Your right on about the bj part, wine does help with that. I loved your song.  Mamac-ta and I use to make up rhyming poems and songs too. Mostly about the boys we lusted after wink

    By kelli on 2007 08 16

  9. Oh it I could so go for a little two buck Chuck now as I type; as Sesame Street is running in the background and has been for the last 3 hrs. Its never too early to drink!! Cause it’s 5:00 O’Clock somewhere.

    By Veronica on 2007 08 16

  10. Oh yeah we’re ALL about the two buck chuck at this house.

    By Absolutely Bananas on 2007 08 16

  11. An ode to two buck chuck is always fun, especially when the correct twang is added. It has been a while since I’ve enjoyed the chuck love, I’ll have to pick up a bottle soon. We’d love to share a few with you guys one of these days : )

    By andrea on 2007 08 16

  12. I am going to go pick me up some 2 buck Chuck and sing that song tonight!  I love it, but sadly for the hubby it’s 2 glasses and I am sleeping.

    By Young on 2007 08 16

  13. Damn, lady!  You are SOOO effing funny!  Does 2-buck-Chuck really cost $3.00 in WA?  cause?  It’s still $2.00 here…. and I see rich ass old beotches that live in Pebble Beach loading their cart up with 4 cases of that stuff! smile

    Have a glass for me, mmkay? 



    By tjsmommy on 2007 08 16

  14. How dare my Chuckie cheat on me with you! wink

    By Friglet on 2007 08 16

  15. I heart Chuck- we like to make Chuck into sangria

    By Sara on 2007 08 17

  16. Awe!  Two buck chuck!  You saved me during grad school!

    By Chantelle on 2007 08 17

  17. You crack me up - that burned a few calories, right?

    By Amy_M on 2007 08 17

  18. Girl, you know that me and Chuck Shaw have a thing. I like him best in sangria though.

    By Kirsten on 2007 08 17

  19. How dry I am, How dry I am!

    By Deb on 2007 08 18

  20. Talk to me about Sangria, y’all. Must. Make. Chuck. My. New. Lovah. Sangria? Off to google recipes. Got one you love?

    By Mrs. Flinger on 2007 08 18