The Ugly

Jul 13, 2009

#Family Life

Sometimes I have The Ugly. The Ugly tends to show up when I’m emotional, irrational, bloated, tired or overwhelmed. The Ugly can start from anything: a facebook update, a tweet, a post, a real life jab.

The Ugly? It sucks.

It sucks out my happiness, my joy, my security, my stamina, my confidence. It reduces a good, healthy, happy 33 year old woman in to a 15 year old girl with zits and generic jeans.

The Ugly, it is bad.

I often recognize The Ugly as just what it is: Ugly. I see it from my place of confidence and can see through its irrationality. But when The Ugly strikes, its loud voice takes over my own and pushes all the confidence down in to one big pile of jealousy.

The Ugly can wear anything but it usually shows up in sweats and makes itself at home.

The Ugly can be a bitch and take up all the sanity in a room.

The Ugly can bring a pack of beer and drink it all.

The Ugly often has no patience.

The Ugly piles on. On the todo list, on the “things you fuck up” list, on the “people you’ve let down” list.

I am not the sum of The Ugly, but rather someone who falls in to its trap. Most days I can shake off The Ugly.

Today, I’m arm wrestling with it. And I’m hoping I win.

P.S. I wrote this last week and today saw Amanda wrote about competitive people and it hit me: That? Is. The. Ugly. It’s the competition where there is none. It’s the jealousy of losing when there is no race. So.. just.. wow. And thank you.


  1. I know The Ugly all too well.

    Hugs, my friend.

    By Angella on 2009 07 13

  2. BLECH! on The Ugly and thanks for linking to Amanda’s post, too!

    By Liz@thisfullhouse on 2009 07 13

  3. Liz and Angella, I can’t WAIT to see you in person and be all “ZOMG ZOMG” because remember how I did that last year? I’m so going to lick you both. Squeee.

    By Mrs. Flinger on 2009 07 13

  4. The Ugly attacked me today and I was unable to get away from it.  Here’s hoping The Ugly stays at bay.  xoxo

    By perksofbeingme on 2009 07 13

  5. Thank you for the reminder that I need to shake off/fight The Ugly.  I’ve had it with me too long.  The longer I wallow in the The Ugly, the uglier it is.

    P.S.  The link to Amanda’s post is not working. :-(

    By Maria on 2009 07 14

  6. Holy crap!  You must have been walking around in my body yesterday.  I was the epitome of UGLY, not sure what triggers it, but it’s been around a lot lately.

    This post totally hits home.

    Thanks for the eye opener, lets shake this thing together. smile

    Or, atleast, before next weekend.  See you in Chicago!

    By AmazingGreis on 2009 07 14

  7. We all suffer from The Ugly on occasion. It’s when it turns into The Hideous that there’s a problem.

    By Crystal on 2009 07 14

  8. I suffer from The Ugly, and try to pretend that I don’t.

    By Miss Grace on 2009 07 14

  9. I have been thinking a LOT about this issue because, I too, have certainly had my fair share of the ugly. 

    We used to deal with it in our real life only and for some of us, we had some fairly healthy coping techniques - (at least those of us a bit older cough40cough had experienced it enough to “get” those type of people) but now with all the facebook, twittering, web-sites, etc. it has brought up some new feelings that we don’t quite know how to deal with. 

    For the most part people do not SHOW their ugly side on FB, Twitter, their blog, etc. in it’s purest form (ok some clearly do, but 99% do not)...they tend to only show their best side and that makes our uGLY rear its ugly head - WHY ISN’T “MY” XXXXX like that?!  When if we we really knew the truth, we’d all be shocked, I’m sure.

    I have a feeling once we can all adjust to this social media frenzy which doesn’t seem to be going anywhere the the less UGLY will show up.  Until then, God help us all.

    By Darla on 2009 07 14

  10. Sometimes I have The Ugly too.

    It blows.

    By Sarah, Goon Squad Sarah on 2009 07 14

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    By Condominiums Mississauga on 2009 07 14

  12. Sometimes I have the Ugly and then another Ugly comes around and beats me up for the first Ugly.

    By Stacy (mama-om) on 2009 07 16

  13. Stacy, I love you. smile

    By Mrs. Flinger on 2009 07 16