Geeky Talks
When the Universe craps on your life, grab some toilet paper
It seems my only outlet (rather, the only healthy outlet) for my frustration is in design. So I quickly came up with a ?what to do when the Universe craps on your life? blog. I KNOW I KNOW! I?ll grab some extra TP and flush like mad until it all goes away.
And here we are. I do like the brown. Don?t think of it as shit-brown. It?s more like chocolate. MMMMMMmmm Chocolate.
Following a *teeny weeny* melt down after talking to the ?advice? nurse (aka: bitchass lady from my pregnancy that is back to haunt me again), I decided to lay the kid down, grab a coffee, and design with some chick music on in the house. Therapeutic for me. Nerdy to you.
Now that I can talk without using the eff bomb every other word, let?s discuss advice nurses and the pitch they give you when you call. I swear to god, it?s like calling India for your computer support. ?Push One to talk to a real person, Press Two to leave a message. Press 3 to be put on hold for thirty minutes. Press 4 if you know they?ll all get you on hold for thirty minutes because you?ve done this before.?
Beep
Elevator music.
Thirty minutes later: ?Hello? Yes? Hi. I have a uterus problem. I need to talk to Uterus Support? ?Yes. I hear that you have Uterus problem? You speak to support? Yes.? Ok. Yes, I had my blood drawn and, well, I wondered what the numbers were and I?m bleeding, see, and I don?t know what to look for in a miscarriage. I don?t know if I?ve seen.. IT ?Well. You to look for tissue. Yes. Have you rebooted? Is it plugged in? Oh. Sorry. Wrong Paper :: sound of shuffling :: Yes. Uterus. I see your number. It is low.? Yes, I know it?s low. I?m hoping to know what it is. I?m having a miscarriage now. Long Pause. Long description of what HCG is that I?ve heard a billion times. More shuffling of papers. ?348.? Ok. My number is at 348. Thank you. Now, what do I look for? ?Yes. The tissue, the result of conception, will be not blood like. It will be grayish and pink. You will cramp and have pain. Then you are to know it is coming. Like labor.? Uh. Like labor? ?Yes. The pain is to like labor when the tissue is coming. Yes. The result of conception will come out to follow.?
I swear to god, if she says ?result of conception? one more time, I?m going to lose it right here. Right now.
She did.
In fact, she said it over and over and over. She kept talking. She kept reading the script. She was heartless, and horrible, and I ended up bawling on the phone to Mr. Flinger, who could not leave work no matter how much the bitch at Kaiser said ?result of conception.?
It was a person. It was a baby. You might not agree, and that?s ok. But to me, it was real. And, for your information, the ?result of conception? makes a person. And THAT is what I?m still looking for coming out of my body.
How long before it?s ok to drink? Someone? ?Cause we just got the BEST Starbucks Liquor (recommended by ) and vanilla vodka for Starbucks Martinis. Care to join?
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Of course it’s a baby. Sheesh. That is tactless that she just kept saying the same thing and reading off a sheet. I would have cried too! It makes me want to cry hearing about it. Hang in there, I am sorry you are going through this. HUGS.
When I miscarried my 1st child 3 years ago, I was willing and ready to rip off anyone’s head who told me “It wasn’t a baby yet.” and strangle the next person who told me, “I’m so sorry for your loss.” (Hence why I haven’t said anything to you since this all started, since all I could think of to say was “I’m sorry…blah blah blah…”). I remember the one and only phone call I made to the doctor’s office after I found out I was miscarriaging…when the bleeding was A LOT (it looked like a gallon a minute was flowing out of me!). I must have dealt with your nurse’s twin…selfish, uncaring bitch that she was…I hung up and cried for 2 hours straight. I swear, they need to give their nurses sensitivity training, especially when dealing with hormonal miscarriaging women!
Anne
P.S. - email me when you have a moment. I’ve lost your email addy and I’ve got a business propisition for you.
I agree with you, what a heartless witch! It is a baby. It is the result. With the ectopic, that is the same thing they said to me..“result of conception”..and I said(as morbid as it is and all hormonal like), so when I am in surgery, can I have a picture of the baby? then I think he “got” how I felt and said yes..sometimes they get too medical and it sucks.You should correct her if you talk to her again! All of this just SUCKS and still praying for ya babe..(((hugs)))
I just have to say that I love you Les. I do! If I was a lesbian who digged meeting other lesbians on the internet, we’d so be heading to Mass for a wedding.
It is a baby. It was your baby. I think they teach those nurses how to be cold hearted fucking twats when they go to school. I’ll find out where she lives and key her car for you.
Hang in there sweetie. You will make it through this. You will! Life has great things in store for you. Because you are my most bitchin-ist friend ever.
Stupid, insensitive people really make me mad. It was a baby! I’ll join you in the Starbucks Martini when you’re ready.
sent you an email…
i *luff* the new design.
and you’re absolutely right: it becomes a baby when you find out about it and fall in love with it.
I love the design. I feel it…deeply.
Why can’t you drink now? I did. Just a nip to help offset the darvocet.
Also, if you start hurting a lot switch to de-caff. For some reason caffiene can increase the physical miscarriage pains.
When I had my miscarriages they were all different. On the first one I passed a large peice of “tissue” about the size of three pointer fingers…plus tons of bleeding. On my other two I just had a amazingly painful, very strong period with just a lot of clots. I guess I wasn’t far enough along on the last two.
Thats the worst! Insensitive people. It’s like their robots or something. My last miscarriage I was like 6 weeks and I didn’t see any grey tissue. Just lots of huge blood clots. Not to be graphic. I’m so sorry that your going through this Leslie. But just remember you’ll meet your baby again someday. You will. My dad passed away 3 years ago and I always picture him holding the two babies I lost. So mix up those martini’s girl. No need to wait. XOXO This too shall pass and you will get through this.
I’m so sorry. Either she has never had children or she’s just an insensitive uterus Nazi. I think you could have a little toddy…you know, a toilet toddy! Sorry…just trying to make you laugh a little. Hang in there hon and big big hugs. No one, especially you, deserves to have someone be so heartless and unfeeling.
Well, I’ll drop the f bomb if you don’t want to. Fuckers. She was an insensitive lout! It is a baby and you are in need of love and support right now.
p.s. I LOVE-CUBED the new look. Umm..chocolate….
What a damn bitch! I am so sorry you had to deal with her insentive ass! Let’s all get togehter get drunk on starbucks martinis and kick her ass!
I can’t believe the level of insensitivity she had when talking to someone who’s obviously going through a difficult time. Why would someone behave like that? It’s like people who are teachers but don’t like children. I don’t get it. Being a nurse is about NURSING. Helping someone back to health, be it mental or physical. I’m sorry she made you feel even worse.
And, I’m so sorry you’re going through this. My vote is “Yes!” to the drink.
I also love the new template. My favorite is the little toilet paper bullets at each post. And the shit (ahem, I mean, chocolate brown) background color.
How do people like that nurse keep their jobs? Surely, there have to be complaints, right? Sorry about that experience. you’re still making us laugh though. You’re good at that.
My sister described the same thing. She didn’t know she was having a miscarriage, she just thought it was an overlong and extremely painful period.
I am also shocked at the level of insensitivity tis nurse demonstrates. And since I am the head bitch-letter- writer, the Doctor would know as well, and then the dr would know that was why I was leaving him. I left a pediatrician for the same reason…shitty, evil, helpers.
So sorry, Les.
S*^$d nurse !
Most probably, you won’t know when you actually loose the baby. It’s more like having a big period (and extra pain).
Hang in there.
oh gosh, I’m coming by for a drink. Have yet to buy that Starbucks liquor because I will drink the whole bottle. What can be better at a time like this than coffee and liquor mixed?
I don’t know why some nurses are like that. Either they are programmed and they have to be in that profession or they have seen it so many times, it doesn’t faze them. I thought about being a nurse but I’m too emotional. Every upsetting patient, every death would upset me to the point that I would be crying along with the families. I love the new design. Hopefully, it won’t be up long and you can replace the brown with pink or blue.
FUUUUCKING BITCHASS NURSE!!!!
Wow. That’s lovely of them. How clinical and uncaring. Jeezus. My doctor called himself to check on me several times, and they say me the day after the “bleeding episode” and did another u/s just to make sure my uterus was nice & empty.
According to http://www.pregnancyloss.info/descriptions_of_procedures.htm#natural:
“Passage of tissue, resembling large blood clots in the earliest weeks up to pinkish/grayish material, possibly even in a discernable sack. Keep in mind that a three-week old embryo is only 2 mm long about like this: _ and you probably aren’t seeing the actually baby, but only the yolk sack or placenta. A four-week old embryo is about a quarter inch long, more like this: __ , still probably impossible to see. Even a six-week old embryo is less than an inch long. Try not to traumatize yourself by searching for the baby.”
So, there you have it. I say drink away, unless you’re on the kind of pain meds that preclude it.
Love & Chocolate is being sent your way.
~Christine
I’ve never been able to identify my (products of conception) babies during a miscarriage. And yes, it hurts like labor and there is no reward at the end to make you forget the pain. If there was ever a time to drink girl - it’s NOW!
When you’re feeling better, why don’t you find out how you can file an official written complaint about how that was handled? Because that kind of treatment from a nurse is unacceptable- and I’d think that the doctors there would want to know their patients are being made to feel that way.
I’m so sorry you’re going through this.
Okay, I just had to chime in to say that when I went to the link about the bitchy nurse bitch (what IS the deal with some of them? This may be the 48,000th time THEY’ve explained something, but for you it’s perhaps the FIRST time - ugh!). Anyway, I was there on the other page and I got SUCKED in to the pictures of LB and I just have to say that she is perhaps the CUTEST child I have ever seen. No, seriously. What a little sweetie! That made my day.
Anyway, next time the bitchy nurse says “result of conception” tell her SHE is the result of conception and you will address her as such until she becomes human. So there.
I’m so sorry. You continue to be in my thoughts.
I’m so sorry you’re still going through this! When I passed my baby, I *knew* that’s what it was. And it hurt like hell…but after having a baby, I’d have to say that the miscarriage was way worse than labor (luff the epidural!).
I’m thinking of you!
First, you are so not a nerd for theraputic designs - we’ve all got our thing. For me, typically reading but last night I did spend about 2.5 hrs creating a ‘master’ grocery list in excel that follows the layout of our HEB plus a recipe shopping list (still not done with that). Hubbie took one look & said, yeah, you’re an accountant.
Dang, I’m sorry about the absolute sucky time you’re having right now. Clearly, you didn’t get those jobs because they are idiots & you’re better off without them. And that nurse obviously didn’t cut it as a real nurse because she kept trying to ‘reboot’ people. Or she’s a fembot. Either way, not qualified to talk to actual people with medical problems.
Don’t know what else to say except I’m praying for you (and you may be tired of hearing that).
Love you and your new java-colored design.
Please drink. Drink drink drink. This sucks and I’m sorry you have to go through it.
I had Kaiser moons ago when I was in DC and I was almost hospitalized with a kidney infection because the nurse kept telling me I had the flu. They SUCK.
That Starbucks liquor is good stuff - you deserve it.
First of all I LOVE the design. (is it weird that I think its pretty???)
And second, what a DUMB nurse. People need to be way more compassionate. Its so aggravating that people can be so heartless and task oriented. URG!!! Here’s to things starting to look up again very soon!
Well, I think you’ve got a band of angry moms ready to go scare the crap out of that sucky nurse. She deserves to be flushed herself.
The new design is cute. I thought chocolate or coffee brown when I saw it - regardless of the big toilet at the top.
Instead of drinking right now, come over and have some chocolate zucchini cupcakes - I made a double batch just the other day because we have zucchini coming out of our ears. Yum.
Drink! Now! I second the person who says its the only dim bright spot in an otherwise grim-ass time. I’m a relocated Brit and we had friends from Scotland over for Christmas. And they brought copious amounts of gin with them from duty free. They were pleased to hear I was pregnant but sorry no drinking would be happening for me. Needless to say I started spotting the next day and went in to the doctors just before it closed on December 23rd. The 24th and 25th were spent miscarrying- super strength Tylenol and Maxi-pads for me please while you’re out gift shopping, thanks. But at least I could get drunk each night, which helped a little.
I was about 7 weeks pregnant and I definately felt things passed. I looked down in the loo but forced myself to flush it away very quickly.
Later on that day the Christmas tree fell down, which is how we now refer to the whole sorry business “the year the Christmas tree fell down”.
On the upside, I didn’t have another period as I got pregnant right away (er waiting six to nine months, as advised by doctor, er no) with my daughter who is almost one.
Take care and partake in the booze and chocolate like now.
{{{{{HUGS}}}}}} Sending big hugs your way!
Holy crap (scuse’ the pun), you have been through the shit lately!
Fiddling with code does have a calming effect.
Sending positive thoughts and energy your way
That must be the “PC” line they’ve been given to say. Freaking nuts. I’m sorry, Leslie.
Um wow. “Result of Conception”? That pisses me off on SO many levels. Stupid, demeaning bitch. I am a nonconfrontational kinda person, but that would have caused me to snap. Have a drink; you deserve it.
I have read so many horrible stories like this! Ob/gyn staff SERIOUSLY need sensitivity training!
And I got “products of conception.” Still a creepy term. And none of it was pink or gray, because it was covered in blood. I was very confused.
Do whatever you need to pamper yourself. You deserve it.